Falling Awake - Ricky Wilson Fanfiction

I Promise

I Promise

Ricky's POV

The sound of "Victorious" by Panic! At The Disco is filling my car as I drive to the studio for a session with the band. We are planning to discuss future set lists and to practice the odd track, mainly the newer ones, which we think could do with some work. We have had trouble with the timing for "Parachute" which is pretty embarrassing when we are performing it live. It should be a good day but there is something slightly different about this whole session, Josh is coming to the studio with me.

I have been staying at Kasey's flat for the past two nights and I am again tonight because of her work schedule. She has had home matches for the past two days and today she is at a long training session which is why Josh is coming with me. I don't mind because I offered and the guys don't mind either but I am just very concerned about this whole situation. Josh is struggling. He is a very self-dependant man and I can see that it is destroying him having to be looked after by his sister. I am doing everything that I can to help which I think she is thankful for.

Kasey is worrying me a lot too; feeling her toss and turn at night is upsetting me greatly. I have tried everything to help. I have been doing the washing, ironing, cooking, shopping but she is still constantly stressed out. 'I can't believe I'm going to hang out with one of the biggest bands in the world.' I hear Josh say to my left making me chuckle.

'We are not that great, don't get your hopes up.' I respond as I turn into my parking space. 'Remember if you need anything today just ask. We are planning on getting chips for lunch.'

'Don't worry Rick man.' He assures me, 'I have my 3DS and Mario Kart to keep me company.' I nod just as I climb out of the car and walk around to the boot. I quickly pop it open and remove Josh's wheelchair from it, unfold it and push it over to by his door. I open the passenger door to let him shimmy his legs out while I slam the boot shut. 'This is going to be testing for your upper body strength.' He taunts.

'I can assure you my upper body strength is fine.' Plus, if Kase can manage then I am sure as hell that I can. Putting my arms around him I pull him up and out with ease before dumping him in the chair, all the time I was tensing with my breath held. Okay, a little harder than I thought it would be.

'Who's your boyfriend Rick?' I hear behind me making me curse and Josh holler. I move away from the chair to see Peanut and Simon approaching us from the studio with huge friendly smiles. 'You must be the wonderful Josh.' Peanut holds his hand out for Josh to shake which he does so.

'I'm not sure about wonderful.' Josh chuckles and then shakes Simon's hand. 'You must be Simon and Peanut.' This surprises me.

'Uh oh has Rick been talking.' Peanut elbows me in the arm.

'No actually. I did a bit of research...I seem to have a bit too much time on my hands lately.' We head inside to find Whitey on the drum kit and Vijay trying his best at strumming a guitar. What's been going on here then? The both immediately get up and greet Josh with a firm handshake before going back to whatever they were up to. 'Can I use the toilet?'

'Of course, do you need help?' I ask but he shakes his head.

'Just direct me and let's see what I can do.' I have got to admire his courage but I can see it is all an act. He likes to be the big man, the one who doesn't need any help but at some point he is going to need all the help he can get.

'Down there to the right.' I point down the corridor and he nods, 'If you need anything just shout. We will hear you.' He starts to wheel himself down the corridor so I join the guys in the main room where they are just fiddling with their various instruments. I sit down on a stool next to the desk with a laptop on and our shared hard drive plugged in. I begin to aimlessly scroll to make myself look busy but I can almost feel the guys sense my uneasiness.

'He seems like a good guy.' Whitey pipes up.

'Yeah...'

'You are worried about Kasey.' Vijay states in realisation and I nod. 'That is understandable.'

'She's just so distant right now.' I swivel on the stool to face them and their concerned expressions. All of them have discarded whatever they were doing before to listen to me which is a rarity because we don't usually get so deep. 'She is constantly stressed out and I am trying to help but...she is such a strong woman and would rather be self-dependent.'

'It looks like it runs in the family.' Peanut comments and signals to the spot where Josh was moments before. I nod at this in agreement. 'Have you tried talking to her about it?'

'There is never any time for talking...tonight I will.' I pause when I hear Josh approaching looking very pleased with himself.

'Curry and a chick flick.' He states when he joins us.

'Sorry?' Simon questions.

'For Kasey. Curry and a chick flick, then she will talk.' He explains, 'Maybe add a bottle of shiraz and she will be talking for days.' So he heard everything. Great. 'I get you are worried Rick...she is worrying me too but she won't open up to me. I am her little brother and she is trying to look after me. She doesn't want me looking after her.' He begins to remove the pair of fingerless gloves he wears to prevent the wheels of his chair rubbing against the palms of his hands. 'Do they know about...Ollie?' He signals to the guys.

'Bits and pieces.' I reply honestly.

'Well...during all that she barely opened up and when she did it wasn't pretty.'

\~.~.~.~.~/

'Ooh shiraz.' Kasey comments after taking a large gulp, she definitely seems happier today so training must have been good. 'Are you trying to get me drunk Mr Wilson?' She kisses me deeply making me groan, both of us juggling our glasses of wine. When she came home we ate some chicken tikka masala with Josh who then retired after a quite eventful day to his room. Before that, Kase obviously helped him bathe and get dressed for bed. After that though she seemed to suddenly calm with a huge smile on her face. I washed up from dinner whilst she had a shower so she is now dressed in mid-thigh, pink pyjama shorts and a tank top.

Things get heated very quickly and soon we are making out on her sofa, the wine left forgotten on the coffee table as our hands are now elsewhere. Hands in her hair, her hands in mine as our tongues dance in each other's mouths passionately, the feeling of growing urge set in the pit of our stomachs. My hands move to her thighs as she moves to sit, facing me, on my lap continuing to kiss me urgently. I run my hands up and down her thighs but then I start to feel something which is alien to me on her legs.

We have done this before, got in on and it has been great really great. I thought that I really knew her body, explored it so of course I notice the roughness along her thigh. Like something has been marked there. I pull apart and her cheesy, lust filled expression falls when she notices my puzzled one. 'What's wrong Ricky?' I don't reply and instead lean to my side so I can look at her thigh, I pull up her shorts and I feel her tense. 'Please...don't.' I ignore her, out of concern, and look down at her thighs. Her marked thighs...a breath catches in my throat as she pulls herself off me. She curls up in a ball at the other end of the sofa giving me the perfect view of what she has done to herself. I can't believe...how could I have been so blind?!

The bruised fists, her being sore under my touch a few days ago...why couldn't I just see? She was obviously crying for help yet I didn't do anything about it. 'This can't go on.' I speak up, my voice breaking. 'You are not coping and this situation is not sustainable...look at what it is doing to you.' I am keeping my voice low so Josh doesn't hear from the next room but all I want to do is shout, shout so she listens and takes it on board.

'I'm sorry Ricky...I'm disgusting.' She blubbers but I shake my head. How could she say that? I shuffle up on the sofa and pull her light form into my arms carefully with a kiss to her head.

'No you are not...don't you ever say that.' I mumble, 'You are beautiful and kind and wonderful so you need to stop doing that to yourself. I love you. Please talk to me.'

'I don't know what to do.' She cries and brings herself closer into my chest.

'Don't worry.' I shush, 'I am going to think of a plan. I promise.'