Karkat and Dave React To: Vantascest

891 32 13
                                    

@Annamom2 requested: Vantascest

KARKAT: OH JOY, YET ANOTHER SHIP INVOLVING KANKRI AND I.
KARKAT: YAY.
KARKAT: THAT WAS SARCASM BY THE WAY.

DAVE: im pretty sure they got that dude.

KARKAT: JUST MAKING SURE!

KARKAT: JUST MAKING SURE!

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

DAVE: btw, this is incest.
DAVE: incest alert everybody.

KARKAT: TECHNICALLY YES BUT SINCE TROLLS HAVE NO CONCEPT OF FAMILY AND SINCE A LOT OF DIFFERENT TROLLS, THAT HAVE NO GENETIC RELATIONS TO ONE ANOTHER WHATSOEVER, DO SHARE THE SAME COLOR BLOOD IT DOESN'T COUNT AS FAMILY EITHER.
KARKAT: THINK OF IT THIS WAY, TROLL BLOOD COLOR IS WHAT EYE COLOR OR HAIR COLOR IS TO HUMANS. IF FAMILIES EXCITED WITHIN ALTERNIAN SOCIETY THAT WENT WITH THE BASIC "YOUR BLOOD COLORS THE SAME" SHIT THEN I COULD GO TO EARTH AND SAY TO, I DON'T KNOW, TWO PEOPLE WITH BLACK HAIR THAT THEY CAN'T DATE BECAUSE THEY HAVE THE SAME HAIR COLOR THEREFORE THEY'RE AUTOMATICALLY RELAED.
KARKAT: NOW IF YOU'RE WONDERING HOW TROLLS KNOW THEY'RE RELATED TO SOMEONE IT'S BECAUSE OF THE HORNS.
KARKAT: ALL HORNS ARE DIFFERENT EXCEPT THE ONES IN INTERMEDIATE GENETIC RELATIONSHIPS. THAT'S HOW WE CAN TELL IF CERTAIN ADULT TROLLS ARE OUR ANCESTORS. IN MY CASE THOUGH, IT'S PRETTY FUCKING EASY TO SEE IF I'M "RELATED" TO SOMEONE BECAUSE MY EXTREMELY RARE BLOOD COLOR. WHILE I WAS ON ALTERNIA, I WAS THE *ONLY* TROLL WITH THAT BLOOD COLOR AND MY LUSUS HAD TO SPECIALLY BRED AND CREATED TO BE MY PERSONAL CUSTODIAN. BUT THAT'S A STORY FOR ANOTHER TIME.
KARKAT: LONG. STORY SHORT, YEAH I GUESS THIS SHIP IS CONSIDERED INCEST SINCE KANKRI AND I ARE IN THE SAME "FAMILY"

DAVE: he legit just wasted all that time explaining troll family and genetics instead of just saying "YEAH DAVE IT'S INCEST."
DAVE: like
DAVE: dude why.
DAVE: 99% of this is just going to be that weird little lesson on troll culture wtf

KARKAT: HEY, AT LEAST NOW YOU KNOW AND YOU'RE A BIT MORE INFORMED ON MY CULTURE.

DAVE: thanks karkat, the more you know.

KARKAT: ANYWAY.
KARKAT: NO.
KARKAT: THAT'S IT.
KARKAT: NO. I DO NOT EVER SEE MYSELF DATING KANKRI. AT ALL. *EVER*. I CAN BARELY STAND HIM AS IT IS I DON'T THINK I WILL **EVER** HAVE ROMANTIC FEELINGS FOR HIM.
KARKAT: HE'S JUST SO ANNOYING AND HE TALKS SO MUCH ABOUT THINGS PEOPLE DON'T EVEN GIVE A SHIT ABOUT. HE CLAIMS TO BE HELPING SOCIETY OUT AND "FIXING IT" WITH HIS STUPID LECTURES BUT IN REALITY ALL THE TOPICS HE TALKS ABOUT IS JUST SHIT THAT *NO ONE* CARES ABOUT. THEN WHEN PEOPLE TRY TO DISCUSS THE IMPORTANT SHIT HE JUST DISMISSES IT.
KARKAT: KANKRI'S JUST A GIANT ASSHOLE.
KARKAT: AND I DON'T THINK HE'D EVER LIKE ME THAT WAY EITHER, MAINLY BECAUSE HE'S A CELIBATE AND BECAUSE I ANNOY THE FUCK OUT OF HIM AS WELL, HE JUST DOESN'T WANT TO ADMIT IT BECAUSE IT MAY "TRIGGER" ME.
KARKAT: ASSHOLE.

DAVE: yo you know what i just realized? this is chapter 69 and yalls symbols is pretty much 69
DAVE: illuminati confirmed.

KARKAT: AGAIN I SAY, ASSHOLE.

Karkat and Dave React to ShipsWhere stories live. Discover now