Rivero Decaying

chapter 22

may contain triggers.

I look at her and nodded. "I want to tell you more about my past as well." we looked at each other waiting to see who would go first. I went to start. " well I never had the greatest time growing up. I was hit and yell at a lot by my step-father and my mother let it happen." I started, Riley look at me and I continue. " I never knew he was my step-father until I was ten. My mother told me that my family wasn't my own so I grew up with her lying to me my whole life and it just got worse after that. The bullying I got from my family hurt so bad. So I just cut them out. I try to kill myself a few times but it never worked because I had one person there for me." I took a deep breath and Riley held onto my hand. " but let me start from the top alright" I gave her a weak smile. "Growing up I never had a home of my own or a room for that matter. I use to share a room with three people, my mother, father, and little sister. It wasn't the best but it was what we could to because we were living with my aunt. She was nice but everyone else would bully me or hit me. So I got used to it until I meet my cousin jay, he was the best he taught me how to play basketball and protected me from my cousin that would hurt me. He couldn't be there all the time so I had one cousin who took advantage of that and me." I started to get me but I had to remain calm.

I took a breath and started up again "he forced himself on me when I was eight and it didn't stop until I was nine." remembering what he did to me and how it changed me made me want to beat something up and cry. " when we left I was a nine-year-old kid who knew how to touch myself and I hated it, I hated him but at the same time I lost my cousin Jays. after that, I just became something I wasn't. I had thoughts of killing myself and I would do self-harm and then when I enter high school, I became hell-bent. I was mad and crazy, I fucked anyone. I know after a rape you become scared of it and never wanted to be in touch again but I became hypersexualize. But then I kind of just broke my second year. I didn't do drugs or anything like that I just got into fights a lot." I didn't know how to tell her about how I started fighting in an underground ring and about how I killed people for sport I didn't know how to tell her about the first person I've loved then how she broke me into nothing. "So after fighting daily in and out of school and running from the cops, I find a place to do it. To fight. It was an underground ring and it paid for every fight you won. I had people place bets on me and to me it was great. But then something happened that I couldn't get out of. I was fighting and then the people started chanted kill, kill, kill and I didn't know what to do. That's when the guy who ran the ring said death match." I look at Riley and try to see anything in her eyes to let me know that I cross the line but nothing was there except her. " I didn't kill him," I said and she nodded. "But then the guy who ran it find me one night and told me to finish it, he was taunting me so I did. I beat the life out of someone but the thing is I enjoy it." I stop talking to look at her to see if she thought I was a monster for what I did but all she did was squeeze my hand. "After that night I fought more and more and I made more money that I didn't know what to do then one day at school I bumped into someone and she took my breath away. I fell for her on that day and I knew I had to get out. So I did one last fight and give him all of my money to get out. He told me that his best fighter was free to go but I would go back once a year to do a showcase fight and for him." I look at Riley and I felt that she was understanding me better a person.

"After that, I never fought again and a few months later I had her. She was sweet and amazing. She didn't know about the fighting but she knew enough to understand I was a little broken but that didn't matter to her. She stays and helps me build myself again. I was changing every day I was with her and I fell deeper and deeper in love with her. Then one day she told me she loved and I said it back. That was the happiest day of my life." I said with a bitter laugh. "She was everything and we were together for two years until she cheated on me with a guy. After that, I never saw her again but instead of fighting I just stay quiet and cut everyone out except my best friend. I was alone for about four and a half years until all of this happen then I meet Jimmy and his brother and Claire and Tabi and you. I change again" I said with a weak smile. Riley didn't say anything instead she hugged me and told me I was broken I was just a little bent. I hugged her back. "You're not a bad person just lost," she told me and I held tighter onto her.

"You're not the only one with a messed up past. My life was kind of like that but instead, it was the boy next door who was six years older then I mean I didn't fight I started smoking and popping pills to take away my pain. I was mess up and high out my mind most of the time until I got into the car and killed someone." she started to shake. "I was fine but she wasn't, I killed my sister because I was high out my mind. After that, I ran away but my parents find me and I got help. I was a mess and didn't know what to do with my life." Riley started to cry. "I miss my sister but she didn't know what was going on, she tried to help me but I push her away but now I'm trying to live and I meet you and Tabi and everyone here is good. I thought I would be gone by now because I messed up so much. I hurt people and hurt myself. I did self-harm and drugs but then you come out of nowhere and save me. I'm broken and yet here you are fixing me without even trying." she said to me. "I was so messed up before all this happen until I left for school and was away from it all. I started to get better but a person I thought I could trust used me and I try to stay clean but it was hard. In the end, I left school and came here for a break but now I'm trying to live. When you find me I was at the end of my rope, I wanted to let go but something in me told me one more day and then you came." she told me looking at me with tears in her eyes. "You saved me Jackie and I fell for you," she told me.

"I love you, Jackie," she told me. "I love you to Riley" and I held her close and tight. "I'm here for you," I told her and she held me tighter. "Our past is dead and gone and we are here for today," I said and kiss her cheek. After that, we fell asleep in each other's arms becoming closer than ever and admitting to each other that we need and love one another.

I woke up and notice that I wasn't in pain on my side and notice that Riley wasn't next to me anymore. I got up and saw her come back in. her hair was wet and she smiled at me. "Hey love," I said. She didn't say anything but climb into my lap and kiss me "morning short stuff' she said . "hold up you're two inches taller than me I ain't short" I said and turn away from her when she went to kiss me. She pushes me down and gets up. "Whatever shorty," she said to me and I throw my dirty shirt at her. I got up and took off my bandage and saw that the hole was no more than just a scar. "You heal up nicely but we have to see Kelly now" I didn't want to see Kelly again but I nodded and put on a shirt and my shoes.

After seeing Kelly and ask a million question I was ready to take a nap but I needed to do some work first. "Not today you are taking a day off," said Riley. "Ok day off," I said and we went to go find Tabi to see if she is ok. We find her and her new friend running outside on this nice spring day. "Ok then we do push up now," she said. Wait, was Tabi working out with her new friend. "You didn't run seven laps Tabi," I said. "Mom she just started out" Tabi argue back and I blush as she calls me mom. "Tell her mommy you help them first then add one," she said to Riley who also blush. "Tabis right love now you have to do some pull-up. "What why I got shot," I said. Riley just laughs and pointed to the bar. I mumbled and went to do my ten pull up. After doing five pull up I felt myself getting heavy. I look down and saw Tabi hanging off of me. "What the hell tabi," I said to her. "Mommy told me to do it," she said and I look up at Riley and glare at her. She is so getting it after I'm done. Five more heavy pull up later I was running after Riley when she ran behind Claire. Claire laughs at us but then pick me up and throw me over her shoulder. "What the fuck Claire put me down," I said to her. "No can do boss Lucy is here and I know you are having a day off but she just wanted to chill and see you," Claire said. I was still on her shoulder as Riley follow to where Lucy was waiting.

"Here is our boss," said Claire. "What's up lucy, hey beth," I said. "Hey we just wanted to get away from BMCC and though we can chill with you guys for a bit." said Beth. "good with us" and that's what we did. We relaxed and worked out getting to know each other better in the process.