A much needed feeling of hope rose up from my stomach as I slowly climbed the stairs. Millions of thoughts floated around my head like leaves on a windy autumn day. I'd just called Mrs. T, "Mom.." A seemingly small thing that means a lot for my relationship with this family.
My birthmother will always be "Mommy" to me, but somehow, someway, I think I can open my heart enough to realize Mrs. T has taken over the role of earthly mother and it's ok for me to acknowledge that. In fact, it's a huge step in the long process of healing I've been going through, to acknowledge that.
I just hope the process of healing that finally seems to be getting somewhere isn't interrupted with another unbearable grief.
I pause for a moment at the top of the stairs and try to shake that thought away.
But when fears for Lacy subside, fears for Josie and Franklin begin to ebb in and the feeling of peace I'd gotten a moment ago vanishes.
Heaving a huge sigh, I walk the length of the hall until I get to the room I one's again am proud to share with Bridget.
"Got annnnyyyyyyyyy... Eights?" I heart Bridget ask wearily.
"Go fish for your own eights!" Natalie exclaims, causing me to laugh as I enter the room.
"Oh hey, Gen!" Natalie greets me. "Come on over we can deal ya in."
"Ok," I agree.
Anything to get my mind off the worry.
"What are we playin?"
"Go fish," Bridget answers. "Ever played."
I smile sheepishly. "Maybe in another life."
Bridget gives me a knowing smile and is about to launch into the explanation of the game when Natalie says,
"Gee Bridge. You didn't tell me she was so poetic."
Bridget scrunches her forehead and gives Natalie a look before rolling her eyes playfully.
"Annnnywaaaay," Bridget says.
"You have your deck of cards. You want four of a kind so you can put them down and to get the cards you ask if other players... Uh... Other players have... The... Cards that..."
Bridget and Natalie begin to burst out laughing as Bridge begins to stumble over her words.
"Wow Bridget you can seriously not explain a single game can you?" Natalie teases.
"Ya know what?" Bridget says, feigning anger, "I'd like to see you do better."
"You know what?" Natalie teases while grabbing the middle pile of cards.
"I think it'd be easier if she just learned on the go."
She dishes seven cards out to me and flashes me her laughing grin.
I shrug and flash a smile of my own.
Grabbing the cards, I adjust my position and dive headfirst into a game I barely know a thing about.
