Diary of a Loner.. 11

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Dear Diary,

I've been thinking, about what happened the other day when I was shopping with Scott and I've come to a conclusion. I'm only physically attracted to Scott. Of course I am he is gorgeous looking! So I am in the clear, I don't have to worry anymore because there is nothing to worry about. It's only physical attraction. I'm not attracted to all of Scott, so I can't possibly have feelings for him. He does have a great personality and we do same share the same interests but we're just friends. There is no other form of attraction that I feel for him.

God it is such a relief to finally be able to say that for certain. I have been freaking out the last couple of days because I couldn't seem to stop thinking about the "incident" in the shop. I have felt so guilty for drooling over Scott's impressive body and then while I was doing that I began noticing things I shouldn't about him. For instance Scott has the most enticing eyes, they're a dark, foresty green and they seem to compliment his silky chestnut brown hair that falls perfectly across his forhead. I even feel bad now for talking about this, how would Daniel feel if he saw this. Saw his very own girlfriend talking about one of his bestfreinds in a manor that she shouldn't be talking. 

I have to stop feeling guilty, I don't like Scott and I am allowed to be physically attracted to him. Just because I have a boyfriend doesn't mean I can't notice these things about other guys. It's ok that I think this about Scott just as long as I don't do anything stupid like become really atrracted to Scott and run off with him. That won't happen though. Scott is a friend and he is going to stay that way.

Wow it feels so good to finally get that off my chest. No more worrying for me, now it's time to start looking forward to Daniel's birthday, which is tomorrow! I am really looking forward to it, I can't wait to spend the whole day with him and I am really looking forward to giving him his presents. I just know that he will love them. Later on in the evening we are throwing a party for him at Scott's house and he has no idea. It's my job to distract him for the day while the others set everything up. I have our whole day planned out. We're going to take a ferry to one of the gorgeous islands off the coast. That way we won't run into any of the others and we can enjoy our day in peace.

The island is renowned for it's breathtaking beauty, every inch is covered in majestic tree's and tropical plants and bushes due to the warm currents that flow through the island. We can go for a swim, have a picnic and explore the island together. I've always wanted to visit the island and I'm really glad that I'm finally doing it. I'm even happier that I get to share the experience with Daniel because I know that he will enjoy it just as much as I will.

Thankfully we are blessed with glorious weather so there is no fear that the day will be ruined by heavy downpours of rain. So everything should go accroding to plan, and if it doesn't. Well who cares I'll be with Daniel, so I'll have fun no matter what happens.

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