So Sad

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A/N I haven't written in like 3 days because my Internet was down. Plus my sister took over my iPod. Sorry!! Oh, before i forget, this is dedicated to @noeonlights. She is an amazing friend that has helped me through so much! Thanks, T!! Anyways this is a random journal entry.

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11/23/11 

It's really sad that I can't even listen to some songs without thinking about you. Music is my only escape in this screwed up life. but half the songs I want to listen to, I can't because when I listen to them, all I think about is how much you screwed everything up. All the songs are the old ones that we useful listen to together. I feel like crap almost every minute because it seems like you don't care. But the thing is, I know you care. I feel like you don't care because you never show it. But now you can't show it vecause you walked out on me. On everything. Any possibilities or chances that we could have seen eachother again. They're gone. Maybe if you would have don't something about this stupid mess, I would know you care. Maybe if you showed you care, I wouldnt have to lock myself in my rooms for hours and only try to listen to the songs that either remind me of you or that we used to listen to together. All the music that I know only because I was practically raised off of it. AC/DC, Led Zepplin, Guns n' Roses, Aerosmith, REO Speedwagon, Green Day, Creed, Poison, and SO MUCH MORE. All the songs and the music that i can barely listen to without having to change it in the middle of the song because I think that I'm goin to either have an emotional or nervous breakdown. I grew up listening to it, because my DADDY listened to it. Funny thing is, you're not even my Daddy anymore. You're my Dad. I've grown up. I'm not the little girl with little pigtails anymore. I love you, i miss you, and I sure the heck still cry out for you but only get yelled out in return. Because apparently I'm not supposed to love someone that doesn't care about me. I just love you. And I miss you. Nothing more or less.

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A/N yeah, shit happens.

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