Chapter 11: Hold On

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[a/n fuck they're so cute i wanna die. (gif ; top/side) i don't really have an excuse as to why i haven't posted in ages. i'm just really lazy and i get sidetracked oops. who do you guys ship more in this? mashton or cashton? let me know!]



A week had passed; Luke, Calum and Michael were back at school, however Ashton wasn't. Anne didn't think he was ready to go back, considering the fact that basically everyone knew what had happened. She wanted the gossip to die down before he went back. Everywhere the boys went, there was always someone whispering about it.

Michael didn't really get glances, since he wasn't the one who saved Ashton. But Luke and Calum have just about had enough of people staring and whispering about them all the time, they were sick of being the centre of attention. It bothered Michael that people wouldn't mind their own business.

It was really starting to affect Luke and Calum and Michael wished he could do something about it. No matter how many times he'd tell the people to stop, they just didn't. Michael had become relatively close with the boys considering what they've been through together and it was safe to say that they had all developed a friendship.

Ever since Michael and Luke went to the mall together, they just hit it off. Luke found himself enjoying Michael's company more than he should, considering him and Ashton were extremely close. He didn't know if they were a thing or not, although Michael said they weren't; Luke knew that he wanted it to be more.

And plus, Luke couldn't just swoop in and steal Michael away. No matter how much he wanted to, he needed to refrain himself. Still, it could also be a good thing. He saw how much Calum liked Ashton and if Luke could spend more time with Michael, they might grow close and become more than friends. It was a win-win situation for the both of them.

But there was only one thing stopping him from his plan; Calum. Calum had been Luke's best friend for as long as he could remember and if he found out what Luke's intentions were, there was no doubt that he would never speak to the blonde again. Calum was all about doing the right thing and it actually annoyed Luke half the time. However, he wouldn't trade his friendship for anything.

It was now Friday afternoon and ever since Anne had rung Calum during the week, he'd been extremely anxious for today. Ashton's mother called asking him to stay at their house to watch Ashton while she went back to work and of course, Calum couldn't say no. She mentioned that she had already taken the whole week off to be with him and if she didn't go back she would lose her job.

So there he was, walking towards Ashton's front door with his bag on his back. He adjusted the strap on his shoulder and turned around, seeing Luke driving off. No matter how much of a dick Luke could be, Calum still really appreciated having him around. As the raven-haired boy knocked on the door, his nerves began to kick in.

He hadn't seen Ashton since he visited him at the hospital last week. They didn't talk much that day. But Calum was okay with it because if he did talk, it was guaranteed that he wouldn't know how to respond. Calum was knocked from his thoughts when the door finally opened, revealing Anne.

"Calum, thank you so much for coming!" Anne said, allowing the boy to come inside. Calum looked around and instantly began to feel uneasy. He squeezed his eyes closed as flashbacks of him finding Ashton lying unconscious on the bathroom floor came flooding back. He unwillingly let out a shaky breath and opened his eyes, sinking down to the floor and landing on his knees.

He took deep breaths and felt about on the ground as if he was trying to grasp a sense of reality. The only thing that snapped him out of it was when he heard his name. He in took a sharp breath, looking up with fearful eyes and saw Anne in front of him.

"Can you hear me? What happened?" Anne asked, concern clear in her tone. Calum just shook his head because he had no idea what had just happened.

"I-I d-don't know..." He spluttered. Anne stood from the ground and helped Calum up, leading him into the living room. She gently pushed him down on the couch and went into the kitchen, bringing him back a glass of water. Anne kept on checking the time on her watch, she didn't want to leave Calum while he was like this, but she was already late.

"I'm sorry, I'm really late. Are you gonna be okay here?" She questioned, already starting to feel guilty. Calum only nodded in response.

"If you need anything, my number is on the fridge. Ashton's asleep so you can rest if you like. I already took anything dangerous out of his room that he could use to... harm himself so he'll be fine." Anne told him, although it looked like she was telling herself.

"I'll be alright and so will Ash," Calum said in attempts to make her feel more at ease. It seemed to work though because she smiled at him before saying her goodbyes and leaving him sitting on the couch.

The boy didn't know how long he was left sitting there for, pondering about what had happened earlier. He hoped that it wouldn't happen again, it was honestly terrifying. The scariest thing about it was that it felt as if he couldn't control it and if it happened again more than once, he really needed to tell someone. This whole situation was taking its toll on him.

Calum slowly opened his eyes, regaining consciousness and was instantly met with darkness; the only source of light coming from the moon shining in through the living room window. He quickly sat up right when he realised he had fallen asleep and instant panic coursed through his body.

"Fuck..." Calum murmured whilst standing up and making his way towards the stairs. He went up quickly, but stopped dead in his tracks when hearing Ashton crying; his mind instantly going to the worst case scenario. The raven-haired boy hurried the rest of the way up the stairs and began breathing heavily as he was about to enter Ashton's room.

And when he finally did, his mouth opened agape. There Ashton was, sitting in the corner of his room scratching vigorously at his wrist and sobbing uncontrollably. Calum instantly rushed over to him and dropped to his knees, trying to grab Ashton's hands however, the boy pushed him away and continued scraping at the cuts on his wrists.

"Ash, fucking stop it!" Calum shouted, voice cracking. Once he finally grabbed hold of Ashton's hands, he laced their fingers together and moved closer so that he was in between his legs and looking directly into his eyes. Ashton whimpered, trying to pull his hands out of Calum's grip.

"I-I need to..." Ashton cried and Calum shook his head.

"Hey, look at me." Calum ordered, but Ashton kept his gaze on his lap. Calum sighed, lightly moving his chin up to look at him and glanced into Ashton's hazel eyes and wiped his stray tears.

"You don't need to do that to yourself. You have so much ahead of you, so much potential. I have a feeling you're gonna go far in life, but if you give up now you'll never know. You may even be able to help people who are going through the same thing as you did in years to come." Calum said genuinely.

"Please, Ash. Just hold on. I know that things will get better, I promise you they will." Ashton didn't say anything, he just pulled Calum into a hug and leaned his head on his shoulder. Ashton sniffled and moved further into his embrace, he appreciated what Calum said even if he didn't really believe it. It was a good feeling knowing that someone else other than Michael cared. Although, he didn't know how long it would last.

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