falling for you (s.m.)

18| goodbye

"Don't worry, Allie. I'll be fine." He smiles, rubbing my arm.

"I'm actually really happy for you. You get to go live your dream now." I smile.

"Yeah it's pretty exciting."

"No, I'm sorry. I've been so focused on the fact that I'll be away from you that I haven't actually thought about how happy I am for you."

"Passengers on the flight to JFK, we are now boarding." Says the lady on the microphone. My heart starts racing.

Shawn walks over to his parents and Aaliyah, hugging them and saying goodbye. He also says bye to Evie, then walks back to me.

We hug tightly again for a moment, and then we kiss. When he pulls away and looks at me, a tear slips out of my eye. "Goodbye, Allie." he says, and I see a tear slip out of his eye. Wow, I thought he'd never cry. "It's only 3 months."

"Bye, Shawn. I love you." I croak.

"This is the last call for passengers on the flight to JFK."

"I have to go. I'll see you soon, okay?" He says, kissing me one more time. I know that is a kiss I will remember for a long time.

And then he walks onto the plane, looking back at me once more and smiling before he's gone.

Surprisingly I think I'll be okay. Maybe this is good for us, I've been very clingy to him lately. I'm still upset though.

I turn to the rest of the group, and although I'm sad, I am not crying, I don't want to cry in public.

"Are we ready to go?" Karen asks, smiling.

"Yeah." I take a deep breath and smile.

-

"Where do you want to go for lunch?" Evie asks. Karen and Manuel drove us to my house, and Evie and I are going out to lunch.

"I don't really care, to be honest," I smile.

"Come on, there's got to be some place you want to go,"

"No, not really," I laugh.

"Come on, Allie. You can't just be all depressed because Shawn's gone. Don't be all like 'I don't care', it really bothers me."

"I'm not! I really just don't care where we go, just as long as it's food."

We keep arguing for awhile, and she finally gets me to say that I want to go to Burger King. So we walk there, since neither of us can drive and it's just down the street from my house.

It's actually pretty nice out, considering that it's the middle of January and we're in Canada. It's still cold though, and I still hate winter.

Once we arrive at Burger King, we order our meals and sit down at the nearest table. It isn't busy in here at all, there's just a few people and it's nice.

"So how are you?" Evie gives me a warm smile, "I mean, with Shawn gone, obviously." she laughs slightly.

"Surprisingly, I'm okay. I think this will be good for us, giving each other some space for awhile." I smile. "I've started to realize that I've been a bit clingy."

"A little bit? Dude, you were so clingy that you were stuck to him like glue. You weren't ever coming off." We both laugh. Evie was always one to make references like that.

"I just, I've realized that what I'm really worried about is the whole reason I'm not going with him. My grandma. I guess I must have been upset that he was leaving, but really didn't know why until now. It's like now he's gone and I've realized that that wasn't what I was so upset about the whole time, you know?"

"Yeah, I understand." She smiles. "As for your grandma, she will be fine. She's always been a fighter, and if there's anyone that will kick cancer's butt, it's her."

Evie always makes me feel better about things. But I guess that's what best friends do. Support each other.

-

"How's New York?" I giggle. Shawn has just settled into his hotel, so we decided to face time.

"Well, the airport was crowded as usual, and super claustrophobic. But the hotel is really nice." he smiles.

"I miss you already." I pout.

"Aw baby girl, I miss you too."

"But you'll be home soon,"

"That's right, only 3 short months. You'll survive." he laughs. It's that cute little laugh that I can't get enough of.

He drives me crazy. There are no words to describe how head over heels in love I am with him. From the moment I first heard about him, to when I literally fell for him, to now, I have never stopped. And I want it to stay like this for a long time.

"I love you, baby girl," he grins.

"I love you more,"

"I think that's impossible,"

"Like you said, anything is possible when you're Shawn Mendes,"

-

a/n THIS IS THE END :((

I just wanted to say how thankful I am. I am just a girl who loves to write, and even though this was my first book and it was absolutely terrible you guys still read it. :))

ALSO THIS IS #218 RIGHT NOW IN FANFICTION! OMG THANK YOU SO MUCH ILY GUYS 😍😱

there will also be an epilogue so don't worry, I'm not done yet ;)

Emma ❤️