falling for you (s.m.)

18| goodbye

18| goodbye

(a/n you might have guessed it but this is the last chapter! 😭 don't worry there will be an epilogue though 😊)

Shawn and I have practically spent every minute together for the past week. I am going to miss him so much.

He is leaving tomorrow, and every time I start to think about him leaving, I start to get tears in my eyes. I try not to think about it too much.

We are sitting in his room, on his bed, and he is laying across my lap, playing with my fingers.

"You're so weird." I roll my eyes.

"What?" he laughs, then plays with my fingers again.

I start to think too much again, like I always do, and my eyes get really watery. Stupid emotions.

"Baby girl, what's wrong?" Shawn asks, and I collapse into his arms and I just start crying yet again.

"Everything. You leaving, my grandma, it's all just a mess." I cry.

"Shh, shh it's okay." he comforts me, rubbing my back. "I'm sure your grandma will be fine, and we will be perfect. We can call, FaceTime, and text everyday. Besides, three months is barely anything. It'll feel like no time at all."

This is what he does. He keeps me sane day to day, without him I honestly don't know what I'd do.

"I love you." I smile, embracing him tighter.

"But I love you more."

"I think that's impossible."

"I am Shawn Mendes, anything is possible if I have anything to do with it."

"I guess that's true," I smirk, "but I still love you more."

-

We stand in the airport lobby, Shawn's mom, dad, and sister here too. Evie also came, for moral support, and Shawn's parents drove us.

Shawn and I hug, my face buried into his chest. I am holding him tightly, and he is singing to me quietly. I never want to let go.

"Maybe I'm just a kid in love,
maybe I'm just a kid in love, oh baby,
if this is what it's like falling in love,
then I don't ever wanna grow up."

Even when we reach the front of the line so he can get his bags checked, he doesn't let go. He just keeps singing to me and holding me tight.

"You make me feel
like I've got it all, yeah
and you make me feel
like I'm just a kid in love
and you make me feel
like I've got it all
and you make me feel
like I don't ever wanna grow up.

Maybe we're just kids in love,
maybe we're just kids in love, oh baby,
if this is what it's like falling in love,
then we don't ever have to grow up.
Maybe we're just kids in love,
maybe we're just kids in love, oh baby,
when we're alone and it's the two of us,
I can't get enough."

There is about 5 minutes until boarding, and I am honestly dreading it. I never want to let go.

He pulls away, looking into my eyes. "I almost forgot!" he smiles, as he goes into one of his bags and pulls out my favourite sweater of his. It's a burgundy, with the black vans logo, and I basically wear it every time I'm at his house. "This is for you. So you can think about me when I'm gone. It'll feel more like I'm there. I even sprayed it with my cologne that I know you love." he smirks.

"It's my favourite sweater!" I exclaim. "This is so sweet. No matter what I could never stop thinking about you, but I low key might wear this every day." I blush, taking the sweater out of his hands and smelling it. He's right, it smells like him. I put it over my head and smile. I am already wearing black leggings, so it works well. "But I wish I had something to give you," I frown.