The Crying Pennant

part 36

  Pan Head and the other goblins were fighting on the stairs. With took out a mini crossbow and mounted a tranquiliser dart in it. He fired the dart at the uppermost goblin who looked round and started up the stairs only to fall down in a sleep. Another two darts dispatched another two goblins.

Ugbash and the other two looked round and saw that they were outnumbered, “Surrender, surrender!” he cried.

  Alf and Trelainne smiled brightly from the bottom of the stairs, “Hello you lot, we wondered if you’d escaped yet?”

  The others all laughed and Biggs got some telephone cord, “Let’s tie these up. Got any tape for their mouths Lee?”

  Lee got some tape out then they tied all six goblins up and dragged them into another room and locked the door.             

  “Now to escape,” said Biggs, “I give the orders now, I’m second in charge,” he ordered as he marched downstairs.

  “Hang on a minute, hang on,” called Sid, “what about Fawr?”

  “Fawr, who’s Fawr? It’s supposed to be Fawh for Fully Armoured War Horse, not Fully Armoured War Rorse,” rebuked Sid, “get your spelling right Author.”

  “Oh yes, Fawh,” said Biggs, “hang on, we’ve rescued the princess, now we’re supposed to defeat the Dark Lord.”

  “What do you mean, kill him?” asked With.

  “I don’t know, as long as we defeat him I don’t suppose it matters,” answered Biggs.

  “What do you think is meant by defeat, defeating his guards, fighting him till he gives up, what?” asked Alf.

  “Ask the author,” said Sid the dwarf. Then, “I’ll ask the author. Author, how do we defeat the Dark Lord?”

  The author did not answer.

  “Oh I forgot, we just had a visit from the fantasy police and they said they were keeping tabs on the author helping us,” a look of realisation crossing Sid’s face.

  “Another idea,” suggested Alf, “why don’t we ask one of the goblins how we can defeat him.”

  “The pansy elf comes up with the idea again,” whined Sid.

  “I’m not a pansy,” said Trelainne.

  “Oh, sorry,” said Sid in a kind of backing down voice.

  Biggs went to get Pan Head and after he unstuck his mouth then proceeded to ask him, “Now goblin, how do we defeat the Dark Lord?”

  “Chop his feet off,” squirmed Pan Head.

  “No, not how to de-feet him, but how to, er, best him in battle,” said Alf.

  “Well you can’t at the moment, not today, he’s taken a short break in the city. He’s going to play in a chess tournament,” replied Pan Head.

  “I know,” chirped Arianne, “we could defeat him at chess.”