Addiction ( a frerard fanfiction )

Chapter 12

About an hour later, Frank was starting to  feel the effects of alcohol. But like always, he had control.

"So, Gerard, don't you have any friends yet ?" Frank asked with a smile 

" Not really, but it has nothing to do with the fact that I'm new here." The older boy took a mouthful of tequila for the umpteenth time. He got off the couch and sighed, he went and got himself his pack of cigarettes, then, he added

"I'm better off my own." 

Frank smiled, Undoubtedly, they were much alike. 

"Yeah, me too." he weakly answered. He stared at Gerard for a minute, he was smoking with the same empty, sad look and Frank couldn't contain himself anymore, maybe it was because of alcohol or maybe his patience reached its maximum, but he finally asked 

"Why do you look so...sad?" 

The room went silent. An oppressive silence. Immediately after asking it, Frank regretted. What the heck was he thinking ? Gerard barely knew him, he wasn't gonna confide in him anytime soon.

Gerard blew smoke and snapped curtly  

"None of your business." 

He went to sit back on the sofa but he fell right nearby. Luckily, he didn't smashed the bottle which was still in his hand, Frank went to help him, he knelt down besides him and gently took the bottle to put it on the coffee table then, he held out his hand. 

"Wow. You can't hold your alcohol ? Yet you didn't drink that much.. " 

Gerard replied angrily, as his ego didn't appreciate this comment

"I did. I had already drank before you got here, smartass" 

Once again, Frank couldn't resist but ask. 

"Do you often...drink on your own?"

"Get off my back with your fucking questions!" 

Frank sighed, his hand was still held out but Gerard didn't accept it, he quietly stood up, so did Frank

"I won't get out until you talk to me." Frank said with his arm crossed 

"You're starting to really piss me off. " 

Frank wasn't going to give up. He looked at Gerard into the eyes insistently.

The older boy rolled his eyes and finally answered 

"Fine. I'm a coward, I'm not brave enough to face reality. Alcohol is the easy way out. There, happy?"  

Frank understood way more than Gerard thought. 

Even tho he still had a lot of questions, he was glad that Gerard finally confessed to him, at least, Frank had not done all of this for nothing.

Gerard looked..weak. He appeared to have lost a part of his confidence, he wasn't quite as intimidating anymore. It was as if the wall which was protecting him was slowly falling apart, like the perfectly impenetrable armor all around him was beginning to crack, and Frank could see that Gerard didn't like this at all, he wasn't feeling secure, or safe. Frank was the first person to ever see this aspect of his personality, this broken aspect that he hated so much and tried so hard to hide.

Gerard was looking at the ground, and then started to bite his nails, he was nervous. 

Frank was filled with a feeling of embarrassment and guilt, but he needed to break the silence which was heavier and heavier each second. He knew he should change the subject, because it was obvious that Gerard wasn't comfortable with this one, but Frank didn't want to give up now, now he had started, his curiosity won't allow him to stop. He needed to know. Besides, Gerard was drunk, yeah, it could seem awful to say it, but Frank intended to take full advantage of the situation. 

The younger boy bit his lower lip and carefully asked 

"What are you scared of, Gerard ?" 

Gerard remained silent, his head down, covered by his black hair, biting his nails even harder now

Frank continued 

"Did.. um, I don't know...did something  happen- " 

But Gerard lifted his head and cut him off, his eyes glowing

"Leave." 

Frank frowned, his eyes wide opened 

"W-what ? No! Not once again! What did I do?" 

"It's not an option. Get out of my house right now." 

Frank stammered, he didn't understand this sudden change of attitude. Why did Gerard have to be so aggressive ? He stood up and exclaimed 

"But why? W-what did-"

Frank didn't have the time to finish his sentence, Gerard stood up and pushed him against the wall, grabbing his collar 

"I told you to leave!" 

Frank shut his eyes, his back was hurting and his head too ; the collision with the wall had been pretty violent. But he refused to quit. He replied, more insistently 

"Talk to me. " 

When he opened his eyes again, Frank couldn't believe it, a tear was rolling down Gerard's cheek

Is he really crying ?! 

Gerard didn't even answer, and Frank didn't add anything either, they were both standing here, looking at each other and Frank knew that he had gone too far, he looked away, feeling bad and stupid.

 Gerard let go of his collar and weakly said 

"..Who do you think you are?" 

A second tear ran down his cheek and he quickly wiped it with the back of his hand

Frank couldn't believe that he saw Gerard crying, and the worst part is that he was the one who made him cry. He just wanted to help him, but apparently, he wasn't very good at it. 

He decided to listen to Gerard, once again, and to leave, it was for the best. He didn't want to make things worst. 

So, without saying anything, he headed towards the door and left.