Diary of a Non-Binary

Part Fifteen

Another fine tip for anyone struggling with anything: get a pet. Pets couldn't care less what you are or what happens to you as long as you feed them and give them attention. Also, for those with anxiety or depression, it's been scientifically proven by some science group thing that petting an animal helps relieve stress and things like that. So long story short, get a pet, pet that pet, be generally happier with your life.

Sometimes I try to avoid showering so much that I can't even remember how long I've gone without one. My parents are pretty clean people and if I go even a couple days without one they'll notice and start yelling at me.

"Why is she so strongly against taking showers?" my dad asked my mom one night. I wanted to say that it's because I can't stand seeing myself in the mirror, can't stand having to wash the body that I've come to hate so much, but my mom cut in before any words came out.

"Laziness," she said, "She's just too lazy to do anything, she'll never get anything done in life if she keeps going like this."

Four marks. Four stabs in the chest. One big hole in my heart.

I'm somehow more offended by people using the word "it" rather than the word "she" because they ironically don't want to offend me but they don't feel like using the tiny bit of effort it takes to use male pronouns instead. Whenever they use that word it just makes e even more uncomfortable, like I've been pushed down to a level below a person to them. Like I'm some thing that they can just shove away in a box and ignore for eternity.

Author's Note: Hey guys, I know that at the time I'm writing this it's only a few of you, but thanks for actually taking your time to read this all the way through here after I sent it to you. Even if you don't really take the meaning out of it, it's nice that you try.  Writing this has been like my personal therapy, just being able to write down what's been happening to me and knowing that someone somewhere could feel the same way really helps. If anyone else has some problems that they could express with words, I would really recommend this. Even if you're not such a great writer, just typing the thoughts in your head as they come to you makes a huge difference. Okay I'm getting all long and rambly now. I love all you guys and I hope you have a wonderful day. I'll probably do an update like this every 15 parts or something, I don't know. Well I hope to see you in the next part!

P.S: Feel free to leave your feedback in the comments, I like to hear what you guys think.