Sing Along Spoby One-Shots

Breathe Me

Help. I have done it again.
I have been here many times before. Hurt myself again today.
And the worst part is there's no one else to blame. 

Spencer Hastings. She knows the difference between right and wrong.
/This/ is wrong. It has been wrong ever since the first time she took one pill. Which escalated to two pills. Which soon enough became 5-10 in a day. Just for good measure. That's what she likes to say. -A has built so much stress in her; so much stress. So much pain. And her parents don't help. Her sister doesn't help. What else can she do? She can't get to sleep. -A kidnapped them not too long ago. They were living, breathing dolls. Chess pieces in -A's games. Puppets In -A's puppet show. These pills get her to sleep. It isn't smart. It isn't great. But what if it is her only choice?

Be my friend.
Hold me.
Wrap me up.
Unfold me.
I am small.. and needy.
Warm me up.
And breathe me.

Toby Cavanaugh. Spencer's only source of love. Spencer's only source of true safety. He told her to call if she ever gets the urge to take pills again. So much for that promise she made. Guilt courses through her veins at the realization. The realization that she has let him down. He doesn't know it yet. She has to tell him. She knows that. He'll be disappointed, but he'll hold her. He'll comfort her. She needs it. She needs that. She needs him like she needs air. He is her lifeline. Without him; she may as well be dead.

   Ouch. I have lost myself again.         
Lost myself and I'm nowhere to
                      be found.

It's late. Spencer knows Toby just got home after long hours of being a police man. A police man for /her./ To fight her evils. To fight her demons. He is doing it for her. Which gives her the courage to raise her small fist and knock on his loft door. She waits a few seconds. Seconds turn into minutes. She turns to leave, but the quiet, distant noise of shuffling around inside reaches her ears and it is too late to back out now. She roots herself to the spot, watching Toby swing the door open with a worried expression taking over quickly. He guides her inside; taking note of the dark circles coloring the skin under her eyes and her nervous state. "Spencer. Did something happen?" She inhales a deep breath, knowing her voice will betray her soon. "I screwed up."

Yeah.
I think that I might break.
Lost myself again and I feel unsafe.

Toby knows what is coming. Any person who is aware of her addiction knows it. He leads her to the couch and nods his head to tell her to proceed. "I haven't slept, Toby. There isn't another choice. Nothing works. -A won't disappear from my head, the alarm won't stop playing in my head. My mind won't shut down. It won't stop turning. I tried. I tried everything on my own. But I'm desperate. I'm just so tired. I'm mentally and physically exhausted and I can't do this anymore. I can't. When I was in Radley, it felt really good not being Spencer Hastings. But nobody turned up for the job, so I guess I'm stuck with it. I'm just so tired, Toby." Spencer has hit rock bottom again. It took a few words, but she is realizing the seriousness of her situation; of her problem. And she has hit rock bottom. And here comes the broken dam. The waterworks.

Be my friend.
Hold me.
Wrap me up.
Unfold me.
I am small... and needy.

Toby holds Spencer. He holds her small frame for dear life. She needs the comfort. She needs reassurance. She needs to know there is still good In the World. She needs him. She needs a lot of things.. but she deserves more too. She deserves an actual life. Not one of fear and angst. Not one with -A. Not one with threats or stalkers and murderers. She deserves a chance. She deserves a life. She deserves love. She deserves so much. "It's up to me to keep you safe. And it is up to me to make things better for you. Easier for you. And One day; you'll be okay. You'll be okay again."

Warm me up.
And breathe me.
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A/N : This is " Breathe me " by Sia. I don't own Pretty Little Liars or "Breathe me." I do; however, own this story and idea. So, if you steal; I'll be watching. Mwahahaha. Anyways, I hope you like my first one. Comment if this is even a good idea. And if you guys like it, I'll happily continue these Sing Along Spoby One-Shots. I already have quite a few songs in mind.. ;)

With lots of love,
- Marissa ❤️❤️😍