Dear No One

Right Here

Some people say that love is something that happens all at once. Like one day you just start noticing someone more. You start to notice how their eyes sparkle when they talk about something they are passionate about. Or the sound of their laugh becomes the sound you want to hear all the time. And maybe that's true for some people. But for Yoongi and Byeol, it was never all-at-once.

Or at least that's what they say. The truth is, the feelings were always there. Hidden somewhere deep inside. But with every moment they shared, those feelings grew until they could no longer be hidden. And now that it's out there, they can finally lay themselves bare, no more pretences, and no more secrets.

But right about now is when all those insecurities start building up. When they start getting paranoid and begin to overthink.

"Will he hate this part of me?"

"Would she get annoyed by this?"

"Maybe he doesn't like it when I'm acting this way."

"Maybe she's just tolerating me."

"What if he-"

"What if she-"

"-stops loving me?"

No one said that being in love was easy.

-

There's a knock on the door and Star wakes up, finding Suga's face mere inches from hers. She smiles and pecks his nose gently, watching his sleeping face before remembering what woke her up. She rubs her sleepy eyes and carefully untangles herself from Yoongi's embrace, not wanting to wake him, knowing that he had not slept well last night because of her.

She walks to the front door and looks through the peephole, wondering who it could possibly be. She rarely gets visitors. But the sight that greets her is an unwelcome one. A very unwelcome sight, indeed. She feels her chest tightening as she staggers back a step, holding on to the wall to keep her balance. She takes a deep breath, quickly composing herself. No, I can't keep being this way.

She opens the door, a blank expression on her face.

"What do you want," she says sternly yet monotonously. It's clear from her tone that she means business and nonsense will not be tolerated.

"Dongsaeng-"

"Don't call me that. You don't have the right to call me that anymore."

"Hayi-chan, I-..." he rakes his fingers through his hair with evident frustration before falling on his knees. "I'm s-sorry..." his voice is thick with emotion as he looks down at the floor in shame. He sniffs as tears roll down his cheeks and meet at his chin before dropping between his knees that remain pinned to the ground.

"I'm sorry... I'm sorry. I- I don't know what else to say... what I did last night was" – he looked up and looked down again, unable to hold her gaze – "it was inexcusable. I- I don't know what got into me I was just..."

He stands up abruptly and Byeolbit takes a step back, pushing the door shut a little. As much as she was trying to put up a strong front, on the inside she was still shaking. Sho sighs and steps back a little, giving her some space and she opens the door just a little bit, her face still wearing that unreadable expression.

"I didn't mean to... I was just so drunk and you looked so much like your sister-"

"You knew who I was." She cuts in curtly. She wasn't going to take any lies. No more bullshit.

He steps further back into the corridor, leaning onto the wall that directly faces the door of her apartment. He leans his head back onto the wall, banging it a couple of times before letting his head fall into his hands and he sank to the floor again.