Love Bird.

Just As Much

On the drive home, I was still working out this plan in my mind. I'd have to lay low - which meant planting clues for Victor would be a little more of a challenge. But, then again, I liked challenges. I'd order some wigs immediately, and keep an open line phone for the girls to call if they encountered anyone suspicious. Finn would give out the order to bug out should anything go wrong, and I would get what I needed done back home and then leave. Just a few weeks more.

I glanced at the rear view mirror as I relaxed back into my seat, and Logan was sitting with his elbow on the door, staring out the window. I only studied his face briefly before turning my gaze back to the road, but the guilt I felt over his expression tore at me. I was hurting him, with my open display of affection for Victor, and I knew who I belonged with. I did love Logan, but not as much as Victor. Not near as much. 

It was a strange revelation to have. Like a knot in my gut that released and the overwhelming rightness of the feeling. I couldn't imagine living without him. And while the feeling was much the same with Logan, it was different. Overwhelmingly so.

Victor was sound asleep, probably exhausted from worrying over me so much. I felt much better after talking with Finn. Safer. I thought back with a smile to when we were leaving.

The sun was just a little past the tree line when we left, after talking the plan out in detail. Finn ignored the bickering of the other two as he pulled me in for a long and affectionate hug. He'd always been the crazy uncle I never had, and at times he reminded me of a father. Even if we didn't visit or see each other for years at a time, it was always as if we'd never parted. Kindred spirits, is what my brother would have called us.

"You let me know if you get in trouble, okay?" He murmured in my ear as he rocked us back and forth. "I may be old but I still know how to kick some ass." 

I smiled to myself as I held him a little tighter, unable to quite get my arms fully around his shoulders, "I'll keep that in mind, Finn. Thank you," I added the last part after a short pause, trying to convey that I was thanking him for more than just the offer to protect me.

He let me go, patting me just a little too hard on the shoulder as he gave me his signature grin. "Don't you worry about nothin' sweetheart. I'll take care of it."

Those last words sounded a little ominous coming from him, but I smiled and thanked him anyway, promising to try. When we left, I noticed that the smile had faded from his face as he watched us pull off. I couldn't explain the uneasy feeling that settled in my gut, and prayed that I wouldn't regret telling Finn as much as I had about it. 

I shifted my eyes to the rear view mirror again, a bit out of habit, and was surprised to meet Logan's eyes. His oceanic irises wore a breathtaking serious expression, and it seemed as though he were simply studying me through the mirror. I couldn't discern what he was looking for, though.

"What?" I asked, turning my gaze again to the road. His expression was a little disconcerting.

There was a moment of pause, and then a long sigh. "Just thinking."

I glanced back into the rear view mirror to see him staring out the window again.

"About...?"

"What if you'd met me first?" I couldn't tell if he was ignoring my prodding question or answering it.

I blinked, watching the road fly past as I went a good seventy MPH down the rural highway. The only thing around us was fields filled with crops of different kinds, and small farms spaced in between, with horses, goats and other animals grazing away. It was a peaceful scene, one that I'd wished to be a part of when I was a little girl. How did all of my dreams come to this?