Reader x BTS

So Many Emotions

The next morning, (F/N) has left the household to move in with Ryan.

You felt apathetic, emotionless. You practically barricaded all of your emotions for her. Your main focus is to spend all of your time with your mother before it was her time.

Your father on the other hand, blocked himself from the world, you as well. You could relate to him in different ways you didn't expect.

You sat on the couch, doing nothing with your time, drifting off into space, waiting for the appointed time to leave for your mother.

You remembered BTS. You haven't watched them at all recently since they left with exception of Seokjin's birthday call. To get yourself peppier, you turned on YouTube and searched for BTS' recent updates and social media. You smiled an unfamiliar smile when you saw their selcas. You had forgotten to smile once, but you regained the gift. You watched interviews and silly videos and laughed and cry and fangirled. You wanted to show them to your mother.

Their album.

You found yourself humming to Whalien 52 and you couldn't help but laugh. How much you relate to it now. The most loneliest thing on Earth.

So many feelings rushed through you and you don't even recognize yourself anymore.

Your mind is roaming around your head and you feel one thing then another feeling.

Confused and lonely, then pity and joy.

You shook your head at that thought and abruptly got up from the couch.

'Stop it stop it stop it stop it—',you thought, 'stop being selfish, think right think tight think right think right.'

You felt a sudden rush of adrenaline along with an idea.

You quickly changed into you casual clothing, black leather jacket, white blouse, blue skinny jeans, and combat boots, and knocked gently on your father's door.

"Dad.. Dad? I'll be.. I'll be leaving now."

No response.

You heaved a sigh. You grabbed your keys and stopped at the door. Your first contact with outside. You chuckled at yourself. You held onto the doorknob tightly and opened the door, feeling the cold fresh air hit you in the face.

'It's this cold..', you thought.

You took each step slowly.
~~~~
You arrived at the hospital, you arrived at your mother's room.

You nearly cried when you saw how pale she has become. Her eyes are shut with her weak and fragile hands clasped above her abdomen. At the sound of your footsteps, your mother opened her eyes faintly along with a strained smile. You knew she was in pain. You knew it took up all her energy to smile.

"Mom.. How have things been," you said while you walked to her side.

She shut her eyes and said in a faint whisper, "Nothing....changed. I'm just glad to see your face, (Y/N)."

She took your hand and grasped it tightly. You did nothing but look.

"Wh-where's..(F/N)..," she asked.

"She moved out," you said without emotion.

Your mother turned to face you, "Why."

"She's with Ryan, Mom. Don't worry," again emotionless.

"Your father..?"

"At home," you stated.

You hear your mother sigh. "He worries me.."

Your mother's oblivion hurts you. She doesn't see what's going on.

You changed the subject from the silent atmosphere.

"Mom, have you listened to their new album?"

"Album," she said, "no I haven't." Your mother chuckled. "I didn't even know."

You smiled sincerely.

You waited by the door when you thought about the idea you had earlier. You pulled out your phone and texted Seokjin.

To: Seokjinnie •3•
---
Seokjin-oppa?

No reply.

After a minute he returned the text.

From: Seokjinnie •3•
---
(Y/N) jagiya? What do you need?

You ignored the "jagiya" and continued to text.

To: Seokjinnie •3•
---
Can you do me a favor? It's for my mom and I want you guys to sing.

Waiting...

From: Seokjinnie •3•
---
What can we do ^^

You texted in lightening speed explaining what you had in mind. They gladly accepted the request and were ready.

"Mom, you'll be hearing a song from their called Butterfly."

You rummaged through your bag and brought out a tablet. Tapping rang around the confined space and ended with an exhale.

You waited. And waited. And waited. Then they answered. Their sweet faces appear on the screen and you nearly broke down but held your composure. They smiled at the sight of your face.

"Momma... Let's listen."

You turned around the tablet as you hear "hellos" and "annyeongs". Your mom beamed. She sat straighter and her hands trembled.

"Oh my.."

"1...2..3.." Namjoon counted through the screen.

"Amugeotdo saenggak hajima.." Jungkook began singing with his beautiful live voice.

You began to hum the tune along with BTS as your mother swayed along with the music, breaking into tears.

Before the song ended, Seokjin sang the last line with all his might, and it hit your mom hard. She started crying uncontrollably. 

They finished the song, and said encouraging words of hope in English and you cried yourself.

The facetime ended and your mom took your hand.

"Thank you, (Y/N). I could die happily."

(A/N): Good day everyone and happy birthday JennaJungkook !!!!! I hope you are having the best birthday and that you enjoy this beautiful update ( >_<").

Sorry it's extremely late but I've been so busyyy. And I didn't keep my promise from last week cuz this update isn't any better. All over the place!!

I hope everyone has had a good week. Until then, Jill out!