The Label Maker

BLOG TWENTY-TWO: THE AWKWARD ONE

awk·ward

ˈôkwərd/ adjective 1. causing difficulty; hard to do or deal with. 2. causing or feeling embarrassment or inconvenience.

The definition of awkward. If you ask me, it sucks. Big time. We use the word all the time. "Well this is awkward." "You are so awkward around him. Don't be." "That looks awkward." And the most common of all, "they're just awkward." There isn't a reason. They didn't have to do anything to you. They could be the nicest kid alive and still, he's awkward.

He's awkward because he has less friends than what the majority of people have. He's awkward because he sits in the front of the class by choice. He's awkward because he doesn't answer questions in class. He's awkward because he never volunteers for anything. He's awkward because he doesn't play any sports. He's awkward because he just is.

She's awkward because she doesn't wear makeup. She's awkward because her makeup is different. She's awkward because she wears glasses. She's awkward because she always dresses nice. She's awkward because she always dresses down. She's awkward because she never dated a boy. She's awkward because she sits with one other person at lunch. She's awkward just because she is.

You throw the word around like it's sand at a lake. You say it before you know what it means. You label someone it before you know them. You talk to your friend about the awkward one without even knowing what they have been through. And I confess, I do it too. I mean, look at me. I run a blog dedicated to labeling people.

I'll let you in a secret. It's not a big one, but it will help. I am awkward. I am the awkward one. I hate public speaking. I have a small circle of lovely friends. And I don't have a boyfriend. Sure, I may have my eye on someone, but I'm not sure if it will go anywhere. I'm awkward. But still, what does it mean?

There is no such thing is awkward. We are all awkward. The word closely relates to weird. They are brothers. They are so close in meaning that it is almost impossible to separate them. But that is what I am here for. To separate you. I'm here to tell you who you are. That is the whole point of me. You are all absolutely right. You know exactly what the awkward person does. You know why they do it. You know how they do it. I could even say that you are awkward for knowing everything.

The awkward one is the one who sits in the front of class by choice. They are the ones who sit with only one other person at lunch. They are the ones who sit in the front of the class by choice. They are the ones who don't play sports. They are the ones who dress different. They are the ones who hate public speaking. They are the ones who don't hang out with people. They are the ones who don't agree with what everyone else does. It isn't a crime to not want to do drugs or drink at parties. It isn't a crime to have sex while still in high school. To everyone else though, because they don't want these things, they are awkward. Even worse things than that.

People are awkward because they aren't like other people. People are awkward because they don't do what others want them to. People are awkward because they don't agree with what is popular. Because what is normally popular, is wrong. The awkward ones have good morals. They won't tolerate people's BS. They won't do things they aren't supposed to. They won't drink. They won't do drugs. They are better than that. And that is what people fail to see.

People are clouded by bad decisions. They are clouded by what they think is right. Most times, what they think is right is actually wrong. Very wrong. The awkward ones see that. They see the world for what it really is. They don't listen to the things that society says. They are awkward because they stand out.

They are awkward because they chose to be. They can tell the difference between right and wrong. I know what you are thinking. This person is more of an innocent saint. It all blends together. You can call the awkward one many things. There are multiple times for everyone. There are multiple ways to say one thing. But to generalize it, awkward is a damn good way of putting it. You could be just as awkward as the person you think is awkward.

That changes everything doesn't it? You've always viewed yourself as the cool cat. The popular queen. The jock. Being awkward is an easy thing to accomplish. You could eat your pizza rolls differently than everyone else does. You could write differently than everyone else does. That's the thing about being awkward. The word applies to ANY situation imaginable. The word can be applied to ANYONE.

That's the thing about me. I label anonymously. You all know what I do, but you don't know who I am. I see what all of you say. I read every comment. I see every word. I know what you think of me. I know what I think of you as well. I know what I do can be wrong. It gets awkward for me talking about all of you. But I have to do it. I accepted it. It's a part of who I am now.

Remember, you all have a place. And it's just in my lifestyle to make sure you all know it.