Life with(out) him

Chapter 2

Mira

Five years Later

'Okay seriously, what is wrong with you?' I yelled into the phone at one of my best friends, who by the way at this moment due to her irritating nature of calling me up at 8 in the morning on a saturday could in every possible way turn into a former one if she didn't have an appropriate answer to this.

'Woman, I love you and I cannot stay away from you even for a minute!'
'Geez Radha, you need to find some better reasons.'
'Ok, wait! Shweta broke up with that jerk.'
Let's just pause and rewind the story a bit since it sounds a bit weird that we'd want to celebrate our best friend breaking up with her 'jerk'.

Manav Rathod, the most attractive, handsome guy in our campus, back when we were in college about three years ago. All was good and we were happy that he fell in love with our friend Shweta. Now, Shweta along with almost everybody had the hots for this guy. A typical scenario in college. But, the thing we did not know about Manav was that he had no heart! And I mean it metaphorically and truthfully. He was a playboy who played with girls and their feelings. Apparently Shweta was blindfolded by 'louve!' And the most horrific thing about their so called relationship was when we caught Manav making out with another girl in the chemistry lab of our college, and the jerk that he was acted like he didn't care. And surprisingly so didn't Shweta. I guess at that point I thought and hoped her brain to be at least a miniscule bigger than a nut. But she proved me wrong. Time and again. So definitely after about 3 years of witnessing this torture it was time to celebrate, though I had absolutely no idea as to how the nut-sized brain grew into its normal size. And frankly at the moment I didn't care. She had broken up with the jerk. It was time to celebrate.

'Mira, she'll call you, please try to act shocked and sad!' I couldn't control the smile that was pasted on my face, 'Sure! That's going to be very difficult!' And that giggling of ours lasted to about more than five minutes. I'm sure my mom must've thought her daughter had completely lost it, when I heard my sister calling me. 'Radhi, I need to go, Sanaya wants to talk. Good for Shweta anyway I don't think I could've managed controlling the laughter.'
'Yes I know Mira! You are always horrible at hiding emotions! See you at HardRock at 7!'

'Sanaya! You wanted to talk?' when I didn't hear her say a thing, I stopped trying to pour the milk in my bowl of cereals and looked at her. Well, for one she was busy analysing me! By that I mean looking at me intensely.
'What?!'
'You sound very happy?'
'Well, I'm glad you asked! Shweta finally broke up with that jerk! And it's time we celebrated it!'
I expected her to join in this happiness since she knew almost everything about the weirdo but ironically I heard her sigh, 'What was that for?'
'You do not understand anything about love do you?'
'Sanaya I am not having this conversation with you!'
'Why? Because I am right?'
'No! Because it is weird!'
I thought she'd finally give up, but there are more irritating people on this planet earth than I would've ever imagined.
'Well, how many relationships have you been in then?'
'I'm not discussing this with my elder sister who thinks she knows about everything in life!' Exasperated at the way the conversation was going I picked up my bowl and started to move back towards my room. I may not have even walked two steps when my adamant sister decided to block my way out. 'You're not going anywhere till we're finished young lady!'
'What is the matter with you? My best friend broke up with her boyfriend who was a jerk and who by the way deserved it, and I am happy that Shweta's nut sized brain figured out what a jackass he was! I don't know how does my definition of love get here and what it has got to do with the number of relationships that I've ever had over the past whatever number of years! So move out of my way before I get even more irritated than I am right now.'
'Wow! You really do get irritated quite easily.'
She did move out of my way though and I ate my breakfast of cereals in peace in my bedroom listening to PinkFlyod.

Once I got calmer I realised what Sanaya was trying to say and she was right. In college I did date two guys which did not last for more than even six months. Why? Because by then they had started getting intimate, by which I mean emotionally. Am I emotionally weak? No. Who am I kidding, I hate attachments, especially when he left me without a word fifteen years ago. Vikram Shekhawat, my best friend since the day I probably opened my eyes. He lived right next door. Well at the time I did not even know what a boyfriend is but if anyone would ever ask me now, it'd always have to be him. He'd take care of me like no one ever had. And no one had the right to speak to me rudely, I loved that pampered way. Well, I guess that is one of the reasons why even today I cannot speak freely to Sanaya as well. I always used to speak my mind to Vikram about anything that troubled me. I thought he was superman and would make every pain and trouble of mine vanish in a second. Well, in my defence I was in high school back then. He was like my soulmate who understood me more than anyone ever did. But then one fine day after school I rushed to meet him, happy to have come first in class just to see a lock on his front door. Vikram was gone. Without a word. Without a goodbye! I never believed it. How could he do that to me? I still do not believe him doing that to me! And I still remember sitting right there on his front porch till darkness grew and my mom came searching for me. And somehow that incident has been carved out in my heart ever since. Any person who tries to demand more from me emotionally I leave them. I never let anyone get close to me ever, well my superman isn't here to make the pain go away anyway. Why take any chances.

Over the years I've come to realise that at times there are incidences like these deeply etched upon your heart which unconsciously define your behaviour in life. For me it was attachment. Being attached to someone made me vulnerable and weak, and somewhere deep down I feared that the person would vanish one day like Vikram did. And I hated that feeling of being vulnerable again. And somehow till today I still believe in the hope that Vikram would be back someday, because I knew that this hole in my heart which was created by his sudden disappearance, could somehow be filled up only by him. Well, enough of Vikram, back to being happy about Shweta's breakup. Celebration. HardRock. 7 pm now that was something to look forward to.

Note: I hope you liked the part, this is from Mira's point of view, at times I'd switch over to another character if required. I'm hoping to update the story as and when I finish with the parts and hope it's on time.