The Currents You Create

Addiction-It Takes Control

"Let him know that you know best, 'cause after all you do know best. Try to step past his defense without granting innocence. Lay down a list of what is wrong, the things you told him all along. Pray to God he hears you. And I pray to God he hears you."~ How To Save A Life, The Fray

EMMA

I looked back to Kyle as my anger raged.

Did Dan know about this? Is Dan doing too? What gives Kyle the right to ruin his life and possibly die? I thought about Seth and how he didn't have the opportunities Kyle had, and yet, Kyle was actually choosing to slowly kill himself.

I remembered the medical lectures on heroin and its effects. I could see several people I knew who did heroin and the consequences they faced even after they cleaned up. Most of them literally had tiny holes in their brain and could not think to their fullest potential.

I reached down and grabbed his arm startling him awake. He stammered back and cowered beneath me.

"Oh it's you. Where's Becky?" He relaxed and sat up straight.

"'Where's Becky?'" I held up the bottle in my hand and saw all the color in his face get flushed. "I don't know, but this seems a bit more important than finding Becky right now. Does Dan know?"

"No. It's nothing really, just a bit of fun. You can't tell any of the guys; they might kick me out of the band," he pleaded.

"Oh, you better believe I'm telling Dan. How could you do this to yourself-to your band members, family, and friends? What kind of animal are you? Do you even know how addictive it is, or what heroin does to your brain? The consequences are irreversible."

"Emma you better not tell him. It's not that big of a deal!"

"Why? You got something to back that threat up with?" I asked. I figured I knew the answer already.

He just stared angrily.

"You just want to tell him so you look like an angel... 'Look at me; I'm better than everyone else. Look at their failures.'"

"Excuse me?" I wasn't sure if he really understood what he was saying or if the drugs had already taken control.

"You heard me. You're so stuck up. I mean you were saying incredibly rude and lofty shit the entire trip here today. It's not even like you are smart or anything-you didn't even go to high school." He stood up now glaring at me.

"Are you implying that I'm dumb?"

"You said it, Love, not me." He glowered.

"I can't believe this. Have you really been spending so much of your energy on Becky that you can't think by yourself anymore? I'm sorry. I'm taking for granted that you could think by yourself before you met her. For your information, I did go to high school, and I fucking aced it. I started college two years early and I was accepted to Yale but turned them down to go to Clemson, a great school. I'm studying to be a doctor. I'm not the one trying to shag a dim whit, and I'm certainly not the one addicted to opioids. So I think you should look at yourself first. 

"What?" He asked as if I was the one thinking illogically.

 I sighed and turned toward the water. This time I spoke sternly, but with more control in my voice, "I'm sorry, Kyle, but I have to tell Dan. It's better for everyone if I do. You know it."

He looked away towards the orange stone cliff behind me, as he ran his hand through his hair.

I began to collect my beach mat and back pack. I was looking for my walky-talky so I could take my leave and get away from Kyle. I couldn't find it immediately so I decided I should leave it for now and ask Dan to get it to me later. I turned towards the stone arch to walk to the populated stretch of the beach when I heard him speak so I turned back one last time.

"Wait, Emma, I'm sorry about what I said. Just- please-don't tell Dan. He's my best friend. I couldn't lose him."

"I'm sorry, Kyle, I truly am, but you need help." I turned back, the arch about a hundred meters away.

That's when it happened. That's when my life started to change drastically. Everything changed.