The Truth About Love, Forever

This cannot be happening

Spencer-

I've been in here for a couple hours now, I had discarded the notebook I found on her bed. I still haven't come up with a way to tell her.

I'm almost asleep when I hear the door open.

Thinking it's Jessica, I say the first thing that comes to mind, "I love you."

"Umm, this is awkward." the voice says.

I turn and stare into the face of Jessica's sister.

"I'm sorry, I thought you were Jessica." I say sheepishly.

"It's fine. What are you still doing here? I thought you had to go."

"Well this was her idea. I didn't want to stay for dinner, it'd be awkward and your mom wouldn't take no for an answer." I blame the hiding on her.

"So you actually listened to her?"

" I didn't have a better place to go."

She sits on the edge of the bed. "So why are you telling Jessica you love her?"

"'Cause I really love her

"From what I've heard, you guys hate each other."

"I only pretended to hate her 'cause I thought she really hated me."

"She never got over you, and I can see why." she leans closer to me and whispers, "'cause you're smokin' hot."

Whoa! This cannot be happening, I can't let her think I like her, but I can't think. She looks a lot like her sister, but she's not Jessica.

She scooches over until she's practically on my lap and whispers in my ear, "I bet you're an amazing kisser."

She grabs the front of my shirt and pulls me closer until her lips are a few centimeters away from mine. I can feel her breath on my face, she smells just like her sister.

"Don't." I say, pushing her away and standing up.

"Why not?"

"You're not her."

"I could be." she pouted.

"I only have feelings for her." I push past her, and before entering the hallway, I check to see if anyone is out there. The coast is clear. I run to the back door and make my escape. I guess I won't be talking to Jessica tonight.

Ashlei-

His words echo in my head, "You're not her."

I have heard those words many times before, even though I'm more popular, all the guys used me to get to her.

She was the ultimate goal. I was just a stepping stone, the ticket that would get them to the grand prize. But ever since she came out of the closet, no guy would even talk to me. They all used me. The only two guys who didn't use me, Spencer and Jason, were the only ones I truly liked. Why should she have the guys I can't have?

Maybe Jason doesn't know she's a lesbian, I might just have to tell him. i skip to my room, I can't wait until Monday.

Jessica-

After dinner, my mom sends me out for some groceries. I get back an hour later. I help my mom take care of everything. She, then heads to her room.

I walk towards my room and hear voices coming from it. I walk in to find my sister talking to my girlfriend.

They both turn and look at me. They seem shocked to see me, but this is my room. I forget about Spencer for the moment.

"What are you guys doing?" I tried to keep my voice down.

"I was just asking her about the boy you kissed at lunch." she spat.

Ashlei leaves quietly, she doesn't like fights unless she is in them.

"My sister isn't supposed to know about you." I whisper yell.

"Well maybe I wanted to hear the truth." a tear falls down her cheek.

"I'm just doing him a favor."

"Some favor." she doesn't seem convinced.

"He doesn't want all the girls trying to be with him. He wants to be left alone."

"Oh."

"Not like you care about what happens to me at school!" I snap, I have completely lost control of what I say, it had just been building up inside me and now it's coming out, "All you care about is your reputation and cheerleading! I gave up everything for you, I told everybody I was gay and hoped you'd do the same! But you left me out to dry!" tears start falling down my face.

"I'm sorry." she whispers.

"It's too late for sorry. Get out!" I whisper yell, pointing at the door. "It's over." I whisper.

She hears me, tears fall down her face and she rushes out of the room.

I grab my pajamas. I don't even feel sad about breaking up with her, I feel like a weight has been lifted and I can be free again.

I change into my pj's and head towards my bed. I reach over and grab my notebook, I toss it to the floor. It opens to a page I don't remember writing. I pick it up and take a closer look. This is not my handwriting. I read the page.

Jessica I know your gay and all but when you said you still loved me

Jessica I don't know how to tell you this the only reason I broke up with you was because I was scared

Jessica I still love you

I had to read it again to be sure, is Spencer just playing with me? But why would he joke about being in love with me? Maybe he hates me so much that he would joke about being in love with me, that thought crushed me. I would have to confront him about it on monday.

My sister walks back in my room and smirks at me.

"What do you want?" I ask.

"Oh nothing, just that if you want your little girlfriend to stay a secret, you have to break up with Jason."

"You wouldn't dare." I screech.

"If I find out you are still dating him. I'll tell everyone he's only dating you cause he feels sorry for you." she smirks at me.

"I hate you." I whisper.

"Goodnight." she says sweetly, before turning around and heading towards her room.

I fall back onto my bed and hold in my scream.

What did I ever do to make her hate me so much? I mean it's not my fault I'm gay.

Besides, it wouldn't be a big deal to just break up with him, we are only fake dating. But then I would be breaking my promise to him. I hate breaking

promises. My heart is breaking a little just thinking about having to break up with him. I mean I've only known him for a day, that's how fast boys get to girls hearts.

I cried myself to sleep.