Forbidden Desires (A Shadam Fiction)

Chapter 4: Unveiling Truths

~Blake’s POV~

The fourth blind audition finally ended, and everyone went into the dressing rooms and back rooms to converse about what had happened during the audition. Dozens of girls, men, and family members sat or stood in excited groups, thrilled they or their relatives had gotten onto the show.

Blake stood against a wall in one of the back rooms for a moment, watching everyone’s bright faces and listening to the loud, enthusiastic chatter. Usher joined him a minute later, smiling at all the contestants approvingly.

“We’re doing good so far.”

“Agreed,” said Blake, distractedly.

“You alright?” Usher gave him a curious look. Deciding he needed fresh air, he mumbled “fine,” and then turned to leave.

Reaching the door, he pushed it open and stepped out into the dark, the chill of the wind causing goosebumps to form on his arms. Letting the door slam behind him, he took a deep breath and heaved a great sigh, his stomach feeling like lead. He walked parallel to the building a ways and then sat down, his back supported by the rough brick. Closing his eyes, he flashed back to earlier in the evening when Adam had sat on his lap looking cute as ever. Opening his eyes again, he shook his head at the darkness. How he wished he didn’t have an attraction to the guy. He was his best friend, and he had to learn to accept that.

Minutes passed in the silence, broken only by the sound of cars a way off. Blake was about to get up and go say goodbye to everyone for the night when the door swung open where he had come out. Fearing it was Shakira, Blake froze.

The person shut the door quietly, unlike Blake. He was unable to tell who it was because of the lack of lighting. They stood there for a moment, letting their eyes adjust. Blake was tempted to go a little further and sneak around the side of the building. He was glad he didn’t when the person called out, their voice sending sweet shivers down his back.

“Blake? I know you’re out here. Come on, buddy. It’s only me. I promise.”

Relaxing, a smile curving onto his mouth, Blake spoke up.

“Over here, dipshit.” His depressed mood evaporated instantly upon seeing Adam’s lanky figure approach. Sitting down, he examined Blake in the darkness for a moment, his head cocked to the side.

“You good?”

He took a moment to answer, looking out into nothing before responding. “Yeah, I’m good.”

Adam continued looking at him for a moment, then slid over and put his head on Blake’s shoulder. It was a good thing he was slouching, or Adam wouldn’t have been able to do so because Blake was so tall.

Blake's nerve endings went into overdrive. He hated that this happened every time Adam merely laid a finger on him. Unintentionally, he relaxed into Adam, and the two sat in the peaceful calm, not speaking, but enjoying each other’s comforting presence. Blake knew there was no where he’d rather be. If only this moment could last forever.

 

~Adam’s POV~

Adam never realized how comforting it was to be with Blake. He always had this weird magnetic pull to him, but never gave a second thought about it. Now, sitting here, with his head on his best friend’s shoulder, did he realize how close they were. He felt something odd stir in his stomach, and wondered whether it meant he was excited to be around him or just hungry. He hoped for the latter.

Adam knew he wasn’t gay. Or bi. Or so he didn’t think so. The whole thing going on with Shakira at the moment proved he wasn’t gay. But bi? He didn’t know. Sitting there in the dark with Blake, he suddenly knew he felt something for the guy, but there was no way he was going to do anything about it. Blake was a guy, and so was he. It would never happen.

But he felt Blake relax against him, almost as soon as he put his head on the large guy’s shoulder, and wondered, What if? It was a risky question to ponder, but he felt it should be noticed. After all, lots could happen in a dark place.

Mentally shaking himself, he scolded himself inwardly about thinking such things. Blake was his best friend. And co worker. And drinking buddy. And pool buddy. And music buddy. And everything else he liked, he did it with Blake. He didn’t realize how much Blake was a part of his life. Like a partner.

After a while they got up and walked to their trailers. The moon had come out, and it brightened things up a bit. Adam felt Blake sneaking looks at him the whole way, and it made Adam’s insides swirl.

When they got to where they were splitting for the night, Adam turned to give Blake a hug. They stayed like that for a long time, silent, content. Painfully, Adam broke the hug.

“Night, man.” He stood there for a minute; Blake had not responded. Even in the dark, Adam could make out the heat in Blake’s eyes. And he knew exactly what it meant.

Ever so slowly, Adam took another step forward, inches away from Blake’s face. Blake met him the rest of the way a millisecond later.

It was like fire hitting ice, an explosion of senses. Adam had never felt such a rush before. Blake’s lips were incredibly soft, but a dam of restricted emotions had broken in Adam and he wanted more. He pushed harder against Blake, and Blake responded immediately. Their kiss became hungry and fierce, an attempt at making up for all the pent up feelings they had. After a few long minutes, they came apart, panting.

Blake swallowed and said, “Damn Adam. Didn’t know you had that in ya.”

Adam looked at him, still catching his breath. What did I just do? That should not have felt that good. “Neither did I.” Looking away, he said, “I think we should go now. Before anyone comes around.” He looked up, into Blake’s face.

“Uh, yeah, right. I’ll see you tomorrow then. Night.” And with that, he turned on his heel and went into his trailer, not looking back to see if Adam had moved.

Adam stood there for a moment, looking out into the field that he had spent the morning hours with Shakira in. Now he stood staring at it wondering what he was going to do.

Laying in bed minutes later, Adam looked out his window at Blake’s trailer. Is he sleeping? What is it going to be like next week at the show? Is it going to be so awkward we aren’t going to be able to hang out? Adam hoped it wouldn’t.

Right before drifting off into a peaceful sleep, Adam touched his lips and smiled, still swollen from his moonlight kiss with Blake.