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••• "My head was turning. I could feel my heart beating fast, my throat was literally caving in.

I earned looks from people around the hallway. Normal people. Doing nothing but staring.

Mocking me.

Everywhere I turned I received glances.

I couldn't stand myself.
I mean, I messed up.

I never should have chosen to stay here when I had the choice. I had the option to leave. To start over. To put my past behind me, but no. I didn't want to change anything. I would have missed Halsey. I would have missed everything.

And now I'm having second thoughts. Finally.

Why now? Why wouldn't I leave this behind?

Why haven't I fessed up to Halsey? And why didn't I say no to Brendon...?

* * * *

I spent all of my free period up there. Sitting on the edge of the school building.

Somehow the blurry mist surrounding me was comforting.

Right now, it was the only thing that made me feel safe.

It was all that I was focusing on. Focusing on the positive was the key to making you happy. Otherwise, your life would be a chaotic mess.

My father used to tell me to never give up on the things that made you happy until you find something that can make you forget about it. Which I stuck to all my life.

My constant reminder of my happy thought was around my neck 24/7.

It's a locket he gave me before he left.

I know that most people think I'm just holding onto an image of my dad which is a lie.

But I know that he didn't walk out on me and my mother. He would never do that.

I think it's better to keep his history a secret rather than exploiting him and his mistakes in disrespect.

I played around with the locket twindled in my fingers. It's cold metal cooled my palms and sent a rush through my body.

Behind me, I heard a door slam. Around this time teachers were either in the lounge or taking a smoke break, which they never took on the roof.  So I knew Brendon was standing right behind me.

He kept silent and gradually ended up sitting beside me.

I really didn't want to see him. I couldn't deal with seeing his face.

Looking down at my own figure, I thought I would refuse to speak. Taking a quick glance down at his black skinny jeans I noticed that we both had been crossing our legs.

I hesitated, but looked down at his black convers- wait. Vans? Brendon doesn't wear Vans.

I then knew Brendon wasn't the one who was sitting beside me.

"Hey." He whispered.

I heard his raspy voice quiver.

With my heart racing, I tried scrubbing my mascara stained cheeks clean, before he noticed I had been crying.

I put my necklace back into my pocket still trying to avoid eye contact. I felt around in my jacket, searching for the glasses I had clipped to the neckline of my shirt, but with no luck, I kept from letting him see me like this.

He placed something fairly light weight in my lap as I searched my bag. It was cool to the touch and felt like glass. I looked down at my lap and smiled when I saw that my sunglasses had been sitting right there in front of me.

"Look, I know it's kind of creepy that I knew that you were up here but all I ask is that you hear me out."

I picked them up and covered my eyes with the shade.

He began to stutter, but eventually started to speak. "Uhm, I was kinda behind you in line earlier, and I saw what happened."

I smiled sarcastically. "Well that was one hell of a first impression."

He laughed to himself and cleared his throat. I turned to take a look at him through my glasses, and but my lip as I looked into his brown eyes.

"No, it's okay." He smiled. "I just.. After the huge scene, you kinda ran off and dropped your sunglasses on the way. If you couldn't already tell, I have the same pair."

He pulled his own from the rim of his hoodie and picked them up to show me the frames.

"I know how expensive they are and I didn't want you to freak out when you realized you dropped them. "

My awkward smile curled my lips and pressured me to ask, "So, how'd you know I was up here?"

He pressed his lips together and looked down at his twindled fingers.

"Well I, uh. After you dropped them I tried catching up to you, but you were a bit too fast, so I didn't get the chance to talk to you. I saw that you were going up to the roof, and I didn't want to disturb you, so I waited outside the door to the stairway and it was getting late so I came up here to give them to you but I didn't want you to be upset with me or something but I' ju-"

"Thank you." I whispered. "But I don't want you to give me pity because I'm this sensitive brat who can't deal with her own problems at home."

I bit the inside of my lip and sighed.

"Look, I'm sorry. I just wanted to hel-"

"I know you did, but I don't need help. I'm fine on my own. Hey, thank you for picking up my glasses and everything, but I'm not looking for my Prince Charming right at this moment. "

I lifted myself up from sitting down and began packing my bag up for my next class.

He tried to keep up with me and stand up. "But Harley, that's not what I me-"

"Thank you for saving my glasses." I said as I pointed to my eyes. "I'll see you later.."

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