High School dropout

"I'm sorry that i cant do anything right "

So it's been 2 weeks since my mum had gone to rehab and living with my Dad had gotten worse. A bunch of dipshits like to come to my dad's house and try to abuse me and rape me and I've honestly have had enough. I walked outside to my car trying not to break down in complete tears when Alex and Ash showed up in Ash's blue Toyota. Its been a week since I've talked to them considering now every time I hang out with them, its a battle of a million questions being thrown my way. They walked out of the car running near me. My "happiness" completely shattered by that point I busted out in tears. "Gabby what's wrong." Ash looked concerned. "What's right." I said looking down. Ash was in tears looking at my fresh cuts from last night. Alex looked at them busting out in tears. "You promised." He said looking at me. "I didn't promise, I said I'd try, but by my arm shows, I obviously gave up." I looked at the ground feeling completely numb. "Gabby me and Ash were always there; YOU COULD'VE CALLED US!" Alex yelled in my face I had it with Alex's bullshit. I looked at him square in the eye. "YOU DONT GET IT! IT DOESNT MATTER HOW MANY PEOPLE SAY THEY ARE THERE FOR ME; I'M STILL GOING TO FEEL ALONE! NO ONE KNOWS HOW MUCH IM BREAKING INSIDE NOT EVEN YOU AND ASH!" I yelled. I went against my car holding my knees up to my face crying. Ash went up to me asking me if I wanted to go with them to Alex's house. "No I'm done trying to 'stay strong'."I air quoted. "I'm just sorry that I let you and Alex down. I'm sorry I'm not a good person. I'm terrible. I'm sorry I'm not the prettiest girl. I'm sorry I'm not a perfect daughter. I'm sorry I don't make good grades. I'm sorry to everyone that has had shit with me. I'm sorry I'm not a good sibling. I'm sorry I'm not a good friend. I'm sorry I'm never there for you when you need me the most. And most importantly I'm sorry I can't do anything right." I said looking at ash blurry from my tears. Ash looked at me with tears in his eyes. "I can't do this anymore I love you Gabby; you're one of my best friends but you're always depressed and I can't handle all this depression around me. " He said hugging me. I held on tight to him. "Please don't leave me." I said crying on his shoulders. "I love you Gabby." He said kissing my forehead. He left with Alex and I had it with everybody at that time. I went inside and grabbed my keys and went in the car. *skip car ride* I knocked on Zoe's door. Zoe was the only one that was there for me and that could make me be happy. "Gabby what's wrong?" She looked at me crying. Ash and Alex came over and Alex yelled at me and then Ash-" "Hold on Gabby. Just come in and explain to me what happened." Zoe cut me off whilst She pulled me into a hug and we sat on her couch. "Alex and Ash came over and Alex yelled at me for not staying clean and now Ash doesn't want to be my friend anymore." I said quickly. "Well fuck them they aren't worth crying over." She said smiling. I smiled back wiping away my tears. After a long day, I got back home and reality hit. You suck. You're worthless. You can tdo anything right. You're a terrible friend. Ash dodged a bullet by getting away from you. You should've got yelled at by Alex. You're a terrible daughter. You're never there for your friends. I was overthinkjng everything and voices in my head were tempting me.

A/N: This may be triggering sorry!!!
I went to my room and grabbed my blade. I went to my bathroom and sank down the wall. "Here's to being alive." I said pushing the blade across my skin. "Here's to being lonely." I said cutting my skin again. "Here's to never being loved by anyone." I said crossing the blade across my skin a third time. Then a 4th time. Then a 5th time. All of a sudden the world was all black ...
A/N: IM RLLY SORRY IVE BEEN INACTIVE AND IM SORRY IF THAT TRIGGERED YOU I WARNED YOU THOUGH