Strings of Memory

Chapter 5

Nilingon ko si Mommy na abala sa pag-aayos ng mga dekorasyon niya sa sala at muling napalunok bago siya tawagin.

"Mom," sabi ko gamit ang seryosong boses. Napahinto siya at tumingin sa akin. Tinuro ko ang mga gamit kong iniwan ko na sa storage room ng dati naming bahay.

"Why did you bring those?" tanong ko.

Hindi naman namin ibinenta ang bahay namin; it's still there, with so many other things left behind. She shouldn't have brought these here. Just seeing them brings back memories—and with them, pain.

Binigyan niya ako ng isang maliit na ngiti. "I thought you might want to use it again," sabi niya at nagkibit balikat.

Humugot ako ng malalim na hininga. "I already told you, I don't need it anymore," may diin kong sabi pero hindi siya natinag. Nanatili pa din ang ngiti sa mga labi niya.

"You're just saying that now dahil ayaw mong magkaroon pa ng kahit na anong koneksyon sa bagay na mahal niyo ng Daddy mo, but that's just wrong. You won't heal if you try to run away," sabi niya gamit ang mahinahon na boses.

But I'm a coward, Mom. I'm scared of being near the thing I loved because they only bring pain, and I don't want to add more weight to what's already breaking my heart.

Nang wala siyang nakuhang sagot mula sa akin ay nagpatuloy siya sa sinasabi. "You can just hide it in your room for the mean time. I'm sure you will need it someday." She gave me a knowing smile and returned to what she's doing without giving me a chance to argue.

Humugot akong muli ng malalim na hininga bago muling tinitigan ang mga gamit ko. I guess I'll have to hide them well so I won't see them—because I know just catching sight of them will only keep this heaviness pressing on my heart, just like now.

Nagpatuloy kami sa pag-aayos. Nang matapos kami sa sala ay nagsimula na akong ayusin ang kwarto ko. Inilagay ko ang mga music-related stuff sa isang sulok ng cabinet at maingat na isinara ito. Then, nag-focus ako sa pag-aayos ng mga damit ko sa kabilang parte. Once everything was in place, I headed out to the kitchen to help my mother.

"Wynther, can you buy what's on this list?" tanong niya pagdating ko sa kusina, at iniabot ang isang maliit na papel na may mga nakasulat.

Kinuha ko iyon at tumango. Binigyan niya ako ng pera, at lumabas na ako ng unit namin. Sakto namang bumukas ang pinto sa kabilang unit kaya napatingin ako doon. Lumabas ang isang lalaki na may magulong buhok. He looked like he just woke up. Naghikab siya at ginulo ang buhok bago napatingin sa akin. I looked into his eyes and saw that they were lifeless, devoid of any emotion, just like mine.

Tinanguan niya ako, kaya tinanguan ko din siya bago naglakad pababa ng building namin.

Habang naglalakad ay hindi ko naiwasang ilabas ang phone ko at magscroll sa Facebook. I need to do something because the walk to the market will be long.

As I was walking, a warm gust of wind suddenly blew. It's so warm that I felt oddly comforted by it.

Napapikit ako at mas dinama ang hangin. What a breath of fresh air. I was enjoying the wind that's strangely blowing on me when I suddenly heard a very high-pitched voice.

"Excuse me!"

Naimulat ko ang mga mata ko at tumingala, and there she is... a girl wearing a skirt was jumping over me. I don't know if my eyes where playing tricks on me, but I also saw a large pair of wings behind her back. Kasabay ng pagkakita ko sa mga pakpak na nasa likod niya ay ang panandaliang panunumbalik ng kulay ng mundo ko. The gray sky was suddenly painted in blue, and I finally saw the color of her clothes. Her skirt had a checkered pattern with different shades of brown. She was wearing a white short-sleeve blouse with a tie that had lines on it. The tie's color was in a lighter shade of brown, while the lines were in a darker shade. She had short brown hair, and she was wearing headphones.

The surroundings seemed to slow down as I watched her in awe. I blinked to see if I was just hallucinating with my world having colors now and, well... with the wings behind her back, but it was still there.

My heart started to race, like it was on a run, just by looking at the girl over me. I just stood frozen in place, staring at her when her fucking knee hit my face. And because of the impact, napaupo ako. The phone I was holding flew because of it.

"Fuck!" Hindi ko napigilang mura. I can't help it. My face hurts. Especially my nose.

Ang anumang nararamdaman ko kanina ay napalitan ng inis dahil sa nangyari. Hinimas ko ang ilong ko at kaagad na tumingin sa babaeng may kagagawan noon. I was so ready to scream my lungs out at her, but she was already gone. Ang tanging nakita ko na lang ay ang papalayo niyang pigura.

The colors that her appearance brought disappeared with her. Tinignan ko ang paligid at nagpakawala ng buntong hininga nang makitang wala na namang kulay ang mundo ko. It's devoid of any colors again.

Nang mapansin kong pinagtitinginan na ako ng mga tao sa paligid ay kaagad akong tumayo at nilapitan ang phone ko na tumilapon. Kinuha ko iyon at binuhay... only for me to see a broken screen.

Fucking hell! Kinagat ko ang pang ibabang labi ko para mapigilan ang sariling magmura ng malakas.

Fuck. Eto ang napapala mo sa kakatitig, Wynther. Why would you even study her appearance? You should have used the time you spent staring to avoid her! Now, what are you going to do? Your phone is broken.

Napapikit ako ng mariin at marahan na hinilot ang sintido ko para mawala ang inis na nararamdaman. What a fucking way to start my new life.