My Borrowed Son

Choices and Change

Chapter Twenty-Two | Choices and Change

Amanda knew she had messed up, but was now even the time to discuss it? Every expert she read about was saying the same thing. Every article and book indicated the same thing.

And yet Amanda couldn't bring herself to do it.

Every adoption parenting book and article she researched said that integrating the fact that the child was adopted as soon and as early as possible would be the healthiest thing for them. Practically every study said that integrating this information as a part of every day life would keep a sense of normalcy and a sense of belonging for the child.

It helped in showing the child that even if they didn't come from you, it didn't mean they were loved or cared for any less. Sharing this information allowed open communication and questions in a "safe space."

The only problem for Amanda was that she didn't have the answers.

She didn't tell Parker early on that she didn't give birth to him.

She didn't tell Parker that she found him at a children's playground under a bench scared and alone after several powerful thunderstorms days prior.

She didn't know what he was if he wasn't a human with some kind of weird genetic disorder.

She didn't even know if his real, biological parents were even alive.

No answers.

No hope of turning back the clock.

No way she could proceed delicately if she wanted to tell Parker anything about his origins.

So, when his fourteenth birthday came and went, Amanda realized that she could only prepare herself for when his questions would inevitably come. Everything was further complicated when Parker finally confessed that he thought he had feelings for his fellow classmate, Lyn.

Amanda had suspected Parker's feelings for months now, but it wasn't until he actually confessed that he thought he had a crush that it seemed real to her. It was obvious to Amanda, but Parker was a bit more reserved when it came to his confessions of puppy love for his friend.

No talk about being boyfriend and girlfriend was mentioned, but Amanda knew it was only a matter of time before any of this happened. It was an exciting and nerve wracking time, but Amanda couldn't help but feel dread for what might lay on the horizon.

The thoughts about a discussion with Parker about him being adopted were also taking a back burner in her mind.

Recently, Amanda's work had given her a promotion and wanted her to start coming into the office regularly rather than being virtual. She trusted her son in being alone in the apartment because she had done it before dozens of times when she needed to go out and couldn't bring or hide Parker.

More than that was the fact Amanda wanted to move into a real home. A beautiful house in a nearby neighborhood had just become available and, after a lot of consideration, Amanda decided to talk to Parker about possibly moving from an apartment to a house.

"Nothing will change. You'll still have your normal classes, but we wouldn't be in a condo attached to other apartments anymore. We would have more space and could really made something special out of it," explained Amanda.

Of course, Parker didn't have to be sold hard on the idea. He had lived in the same place all his life and wanted his mom to be happy. She had talked about buying a house for years and Parker had always wanted to experience a move. All of his other friends seemed to experience it after all.

The promise of a new adventure was thrilling, so Parker agreed.

"Yeah! Is it a big place? Are there lots of rooms? Is it far away? Or is it close?" asked Parker.