He Hates Me Or Does He?

PART 30: THE NGO LESSON

Oh so this was something about bullying. I get it now. Someone might have been caught bullying.

After half an hour of what I can call a tea break, students from secondary classes approach the hall and get seated. Vihaan stands again from his chair and proceeds with his lecture. The secondary classes of our NGO are occupied by majority of girls which is intriguing in itself and somewhat good too. I feel happy to see these girls coming to gain education.

" Children."

Oh here another story starts. But it's really engrossing though. He talks really good.

"  Today we are going to learn about a very concerning yet interesting matter and it's "Abuse". It might sound so obvious that abuse is just a form of bullying or related to a form of violence or a way of hurting. But in reality, abuse has more than one form which is why we will learn about the ways an abuse gets validated and sometimes even get appreciated and acknowledged in a society with its deep yet invisible roots taking shelter in a society. Let's learn it with a story, shall we?"

I hear yes from children already engrossed in the story.

" Ah So once upon a time, there was one man and one woman let's say named Aman and Amrita." He says making it sound cliche yet classic. " hehe well, so they both were married, completely in love with each other. Aman was a businessmen and Amrita well she was a writer. They had a love marriage unlike most of the Indian couples. So yes, they were happily married and used to take trips twice a year, used to respect each other too."

I feel tired so I sit down in a chair too. I take a sip of coffee that was served to us five minutes ago. I feel so good today.

" Aman was very sharp minded, clever, passionate and handsome and Amrita was intelligent, beautiful, kind and gentle. They both complemented each other very well.

But soon, they started fighting a lot which is also let me tell you all very usual in marriages. When two people are in a relationship, conflicts and disagreements are very normal. But that was not the case with them. While it was normal for Amrita who always took those fights very lightly and just healthy way of coping with things, Aman on the other hand took the fights with a pinch of salt. He did not consider those fights to be normal, he took them on his ego. According to him, those fights shouldn't occur and Amrita should listen to her. Amrita shouldn't fight with her or even talk back.

But you see people, he loved her. He knew that Amrita is smart and generous. If he will be violent, he knew Amrita will leave her. So to make things comfortable for him, he started slowly gaslighting Amrita. He started making up stories about Amrita's loved ones and distanced her from them very subtly. After some time, he slowly gaslighted her into thinking that she's getting toxic day by day and she hurts him too. He took her to a doctor and gave her the wrong diagnosis of a mental disorder. Amrita believed in him and promised to make things better for him.

Slowly and subtly, Amrita started forgetting things. And in those moments of forgetfulness, Aman claimed that she hurted him or made a joke out of him in public further gaslighting and manipulating her and made her feel like that she's the problem and he is one big of a man cause he is still in love with her and is motivated to make things better for him.

Now after all this, when Amrita resigned from her work and got her confidence shattered, Aman started getting violent, both physically and mentally. By now, Amrita was all shattered and knew that there's no other option for her but only to follow Aman wholeheartedly since he is the only one with him now. It continued until Aman one day mistakenly beat her unto death. End of the story folks.

I know you all are taken aback and I know that the story is very dark and sad. But my dear children, the reason I taught you this story is all because violence or abuse does not come to us straightforwardly most of the times. Sometimes, it comes to us in the forms we never could have imagined before. Sometimes, we feel that there's no way out of the misery but I just want to tell you that it's false. There's always 100% chances of getting us out of our misery if we want to. If you see something false happening around you in direct or in indirect ways, I urge you all to understand this that there's a way out. Today is Action against Domestic Violence Day and I wanted to share this story with y'all so that you all can understand the importance and the message this day seeks to highlight." He finishes his speech and starts coming towards us.

Vihaan sits right beside me and now it's the turn of NGO principle to say something. " Pass me the coffee please." He asks gently.

My hands are all sweaty with anxiety. The fear of anxiety gets me at any time these days sometimes by a trigger and sometimes not, and sometimes I don't even realise if there was a trigger. I hold the cup to give it to him but my hands are all shaking with anxiety which is so freaking visible to everybody.

"Careful." He leans forward from his chair and hold the cup from over my hand and controls the trembling of my hand with his firm grip. " Can you relax.?" He asks raising his eyebrows looking at me.

" I am alright." I say giving the cup to him and instantly withdrawing my hand from his. I sit down and start practicing 4-7-8. My hands are cold and sweaty and from the look on his face, I can guess that knows that I had an anxiety episode. For a brief moment of time, we stay silent and listen to the principal.

" It was the coffee I guess. It heightens my anxiety I guess." I try to reassure him that I might have got anxious because of the coffee.

He smiles. " I see. A cup of coffee, of which you have taken only one sip presumably or maybe it's something else Anika. You just don't want to see it." He says on a serious note.

" What do you mean?" I ask.

" Just don't drink your coffee if it bothers you that much. You know what I mean." He rises from the chair and leaves. Why did he get so mad.