in my dreams.

iv : no memories but these

IV.      ANYA   !
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no memories but these

          Anya's first stop when she landed on the Argo II: the bathroom to throw up. If it was from the hot chocolate or running around trying not to get killed, or even the migraines overwhelming her, she wasn't entirely sure. It took her a few minutes to calm down her stomach. Annabeth fed her a bit of nectar to keep the migraines mild, even a few ibuprofens she kept on board ( half-bloods still needed their mortal medicine even if few denied it ) . When they went back on deck, Leo was wide awake and rubbing his head. A medium-sized welt was forming on his forehead considering Percy had knocked him out good when he jumped on him. He was in the middle of trying to explain what happened. He felt like he was watching himself bomb the camp: "like watching a TV show".

His thoughts hurt more to listen to.

Leo wished he could invent a time machine. He'd go back two hours and undo what had happened. Either that, or he could invent a Slap-Leo-in-the-Face machine to punish himself. Leo wasn't a liar, but Frank and Percy insisted Anya stayed to make sure the full story was true. Anya had no words to say when she knew Leo wasn't lying about being the one to attack the camp. All she could do was give a pained look at her friend. Her friend who clearly didn't mean for anything to happen yet it was still his fault.

"One more time," Annabeth said. "Exactly what happened?"

Leo slumped against the mast. Anya felt several emotions crowd into her brain from everyone on deck. All around the group, his beautiful new ship was in shambles. The aft crossbows were piles of kindling. The foresail was tattered. The satellite array that powered the onboard Internet and TV was blown to bits, which had really made Coach Hedge mad. Their bronze dragon figurehead, Festus, was coughing up smoke like he had a hairball. Not a pleasant look.

Leo choked back a sob. "I don't know. It's fuzzy."

Too many people were around for Anya to think clearly: Annabeth, Coach Hedge with his furry goat legs, his orange polo shirt, and his baseball bat ( did he have to carry that everywhere? Anya learned yes, yes he did. ), and the newcomer, Frank.

Annabeth crossed her arms. "You mean you don't remember?"

"I . . ." Leo looked like he was trying to swallow a marble. "I remember, but it's like I was watching myself do things. I couldn't control it."

"Anya?" Annabeth turned to the psychic girl. Anya knew she didn't want Leo to be guilty, but it was hard when he was not only telling the truth to everyone around them, but his thoughts were telling Anya the exact same thing. All she could do was shrug at the blonde. What else was there to add? Leo was saying it all for her. The two of them met eyes. It was a silent conversation between Anya and Leo, not that he knew what she was thinking but she knew what he was.

I'm so so sorry, Anya. Please don't hate me.

Leo and Anya had similar stories; they could relate to one another on a level not even Jason or Piper could understand. They had both been runaways, exiles from their worlds. Not to mention dead parents are at the top of their checklists. Leo and Anya had been kids just trying to survive. Even if their paths hadn't crossed until they arrived at the Wilderness School, it felt as if they were two sides of the same coin. But he was still to blame for ruining the plan. So Anya should've been angry, feeling betrayed. She should hate him for ruining everything and making things worse. But this was Leo. How could she?