Haunted Hearts

Chapter 17

No.
No.
No. No. No. No.

My legs were shaking so badly but I still managed to stand as fast as I could.
I recoiled as the realization washed over me like an unforgiving wave, threatening to drown me in its suffocating embrace. My heart hammered against my ribs, each beat a painful reminder of the cruel twist of fate unraveling before my eyes.

My soul.
He had half of my soul.
This disgusting despicable horrible thing from hell had half of my soul. I always knew there was something wrong with me but I never imagined it was because I shared a soul with an actual demon.
With a sadistic killer.
The sickness churned in the pit of my stomach, a bitter taste of dread staining my tongue.
How could destiny be so... thoughtless.

He stood next to me and extended his hand tentatively, "it means nothing," he murmured softly.

"Means nothing? We share a damned soul," I choked out, the bile rising in my throat, "me and you. you and I. My soul. Which is not even mine. We. Share. It."

"Yes, but—" he began, furrowing his eyebrows.

I shoved him away, my rejection fueled by a blazing rage that consumed me whole. I didn't care if his shadows ate me alive, or if he cut my entire body in half. I didn't care about anything. I was tainted. I was dirty and marked and half my soul was damned. Which probably meant, my half was damned too. "I would rather die than have anything to do with you," I spat, defiance flashing in my eyes.

"We only share a soul," he simply said unbothered by my words, "we didn't really had a choice about it."

"Yeah, you're right. Because I would never choose you," I retorted, loathing burning bright in my eyes. I didn't even stop to watch his reaction as I walked away from him.

I found solace on the opposite side of the museum entrance, sinking onto the cold stone bench. With trembling hands, I covered my face, desperately attempting to quell the storm raging within me. Tears started to fall. What was the point in fighting this? He had half of my soul anyway. Everything was so pointless. Worst part was, I didn't know what I would do. How would I tell Elena? Logan?...
Logan's voice echoed in my mind, urging me to regain control of my breath.
Inhale.
Exhale.
How am I going to tell Logan.
He would probably think the worst of me, it would make sense because my main core is shared with an actual demon. And in return, that probably made me a demon too.

Would Logan understand?
Would he think that we are equally evil because we share a soul?
Should I even tell them?
Would their support waver upon learning the truth?

My thoughts spiraled out of control, each possibility more daunting than the last. In that moment of desperation, I longed for Mia's guidance, her wisdom to light my path. I grabbed her rosary and kissed it as my tears got it wet. She would know what to do. She always knew what to do.
But she was gone, and I was alone.
Completely alone.
As I've always been.
As I will always be.

And when Elena and Logan inevitably discovered my secret, they would surely abandon me. I was rotten, shackled to a demon by the bonds of our shared soul.
There was no escape.
Not even Logan could save me from that.
A single tear streamed down my face.

I sensed someone settling beside me, but I couldn't bring myself to look. I had reached a point where I was beyond broken. I was completely rotten.
What was the point?
Why keep going?
My life had been a turbulent mess since my mother's departure. At seventeen, I had assumed the role of a mother to my younger sister, burdened by the weight of my father's irresponsibility and stupidity. I had lost everything over and over again. First my friends, my boyfriend, my sense of self, my mother and father, and now my sister and my soul. Because even if I got to keep it what was the point if I had to share it with a literal demon?
I yearned for an end to the chaos, for respite from the relentless torment.