Death Curse Escapade [BL]

Tatlumpu't lima

Saturnino

I am so scared of death before, I felt like when it happens to my family especially to my mother, I'll be weaken... I know that I'll be alone. Name by itself is already scary as hell, like it was a forbidden word that I have to prevent saying because I believe that it's a jinx. That when I uttered them, something will happen.

Pero hindi ko aakalain na ang kinakatakutan ko ay mangyayari, nang mamatay si Iyanna. Sa mga oras na 'yon, hindi ko alam kung anong gagawin ko lalo na't kitang-kita ng mga mata ko kung paano magsilabasan ang mga dugo sa katawan ng kaibigan ko. Hindi ko alam kung anong gagawin ko lalo na't alam kong hindi na siya humihinga. Hindi ko alam kung anong gagawin ko sa mga oras na 'yon lalo na't ako lang mag-isang nagmamakaawa sa lugar na 'yon.

Nakakatakot. Sobrang nakakatakot.

No'ng araw na 'yon ay nanginginig akong ginigising ang katawan ni Iyanna habang nagmamakaawa sa Diyos na baka sana ay mabuhay siya o sana ay panaginip lang ang lahat. Na sana ay hindi totoo ang mga narinig ko, na sana ay hindi totoo lahat ng mga nangyari sa abandonadong gusali na 'yon!

But when I woke up, mourn, cries, sadness, sorrows, pain and regrets are filled me in. Especially when I saw how her parents crying so hard while caressing the glass of her coffin. Where my bestfriend lying in the cage of death, sleeping peacefully.

I just can't believe that in her early age, the destiny stole her life. The destiny took her happiness so early, the destiny broke not just her family but mine's heart too. It was so scary, so scary when I heard all the arguments from their family to the police officials. They did nothing to find the culprit, they did nothing to find the justice.

"Love, you have to eat." Lumingon ako sa nag-aalalang mukha ni Giordan habang nakatitig sa walang buhay na mga mata ko. Ngumiti ako sa kaniya ng tipid.

"W-Wala akong gana, love. Puwedeng mamaya na muna?" Turan ko sa kaniya, inobserbahan pa niya ako bago siya tumango. He caressed my head that made me close my eyes because of the sadness and at the same time, comfort from him.

How ironic because I don't fear death anymore, because I am its son. Death is my father, it is my destiny, it's my blood and it is my life.

Sinong mag-aakala na ang kamatayan na kinakatakutan ko noon ay siyang nagbibigay sa akin ng lakas at kapangyarihan? Sinong mag-aakala na ang kamatayan ay siya palang tatay ko? Na siya pala ang matagal ko ng hinahanap?

I don't fear death anymore, it is because of the experiences I've been through all the time. Saving people, saving my friends, saving entities and risking my life from other creatures. It was like, death is my guardian, it brings me pain but at the same time, power.

I don't know what will I do, thinking that I can't escape the curse I am carrying within me. That death is not chasing me, but I am the one who is chasing it.

Hindi ko namalayan na naluluha na naman pala ako habang nakaharap sa malaking krus kung saan nakapako ang imahe ni Hesus. Siya si Bathala, at alam kong siya ang gumawa ng lahat ng bagay. I know to myself that I am not religious kind of person that's why I don't know if this God in front of me can grant my wishes.

Hindi ko nakayanan ang pagkamatay ni Iyanna kaya mas hindi ko kakayanin kong pati si Mommy ay mawawala rin sa akin. Alam kong hindi naging maganda ang huli naming pagkikita lalo na't may matinding alitan ang nangyari sa aming dalawa.