Love Restrained

chapter eleven

XI

They've been walking for hours and Hayden couldn't stop replaying the fight she had with Natalie. Her nose hurt like a bitch.

"You may deny it, but you and I are more alike than you think."

She hated to admit it that the argument was consuming her. No matter how hard tried to distract herself, talk to the other girls, enjoy the view during the walk, she just couldn't stop thinking about it.

Natalie has really gotten to her on this one. How could she say such things? How could she be so cruel? Exposing her like that?

But Nat wasn't wrong, and that's what bothered Hayden the most, she could see right through her, and Hayden was scared of being seen.

She was also so pissed to remember about Mitchell and Natalie. Ugh. How could something bother someone so much, even after years had passed. It was like she just wasn't able to get over it.

"You are a fucking pussy."

Was she really? Was she trying to run away? No. She was there to help Taissa.

It was true that Hayden didn't want to be around Natalie anymore. Actually, she just needed some time off, and that wasn't possible if she was forced to spend most part of her day with the girl. But, overall, Taissa needed help with her plan, so she was there for a good cause.

And now Natalie would have to hunt with Travis, and that was another thing that bothered her. She's seen Travis looking at Nat before, not just any look, but one filled with desire. She knew that he would probably try something with Natalie, and she wasn't supposed to care about that, but somehow she did.

"Okay, I think it's time to take a little break." Taissa told the group, placing her bag on the ground.

The girls all agreed and sat in a circle to rest a little and drink some water, except for Hayden, who chose to seat by a tree a few feet away from them.

Taissa noticing the girl was a little off and distance since they left, decided to talk to her.

"Hey... mind if I join?"

"Please." Hayden indicated a spot next to her.

Taissa sat down quietly next to her, waiting to see if the girl would enroll in some conversation or something, but she didn't.

"I can see that something is bothering you." Taissa broke the silence.

Hayden just sighed avoiding eye contact.

"Is this about what happened with Natalie?" Taissa insisted.

Not sure if she should say something or just stay quiet to see if Taissa dropped it, Hayden took a deep breath before letting it out.

"I just... I don't know, I just wished coach hadn't paired us up."

"Look, I know Nat can be difficult sometimes-"

"Sometimes?" Hayden almost laughed "Tai, she's insufferable all the time."

"Yeah, I know that she is a bitch to you, but Atkins, you don't go easy on her either." Tai turned to look at her.

Hayden knew Taissa was right, so she didn't protest, just listened.

"From what I see, she just reacts." Taissa explained. "I'm not saying you're guilty for all the fights ok, I just think you should give her a chance."

"Yeah, right." Hayden scoffed.

"I'm serious." Taissa glared at her. "You would be surprised with how you two could get along if you actually gave her a chance."

"Since of when you're friends with Natalie?" Hayden questioned.

"Her and Van live in the same neighborhood." Taissa explained "She has a lot of issues too but she was always there when Van needed her."

"Does she know about you guys?"

"We never told her, but she's not dumb."

Hayden let out a small chuckle, thinking about what Taissa was saying. Maybe Natalie wasn't the monster she thought she was. Maybe Tai was right, maybe she just needed to give her a chance.

But still, there was something stopping her from trying to get to know Natalie. Something that she didn't understand, but it was there. Like she was afraid of what could happen if she let Natalie see her, really see her.

"You know... she believes that she is a bad person, but deep down she has a big heart."

"Yeah, I don't know Tai..." Hayden knew she was probably right, but she didn't know if she was ready to try being friends with Nat.

"Trust me, she's only a bitch to you because you are a bitch to her." Taissa concluded

"Now let's get going, before it gets dark." She got up from the spot, helping Hayden to her feet so they could join the others to continue with the expedition.

.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.

Back at the cabin, Natalie was trying to find something that could glue the letter she had ripped.

She was feeling awful. Maybe she went too far this time, because she never felt bad after a fight with Atkins. She had always liked the feeling of getting her hands on the girl, but almost breaking her nose was too much.

She didn't mean the things she said. She didn't think Hayden was a coward and she also didn't mean to make her leave.

Natalie didn't find anything that could make the letter whole again, so she decided to just put it in Hayden's bag again.

As she opened the bag a mixtape was the first thing she found inside of it. Guns N Roses, really? She studied the tape for a while.

"What a loser." She said to herself returning it to the bag and putting the ripped letter on top of it.

"Are you ready?" Travis' voice made her turn around.

"Um, yeah." She said, making her way to the door and grabbing the gun as Travis followed her.

Nat could tell that Travis was nervous around her as they wandered through the woods, and she knew why. She noticed him before, staring at her, smiling and looking away, but she never corresponded.

As the boy tried to engage in a conversation with her to light up the mood, she couldn't help but think that if it was Hayden there they would probably be arguing over something stupid.

Why couldn't she stop thinking about that damn girl for just one second? She should be feeling relieved that she wasn't around. But why was she having this strange feeling in her chest? It wasn't supposed to be that way.

Natalie pushed all those thoughts and feelings away, smiling at Travis and trying her best to seem interested in what he was talking about.