Hazbin Hotel - The Rebirth

The Pilot

In the grand Hazbin Hotel, Lucifer stands outside Charlie's room.

Lucifer: (panicking) Okay, Lucifer, time to attempt to bond with Charlie, and hopefully not screw up our bond like I did with her mother.

Voice: (mockingly) How cute.

Lucifer turns around to see Alastor.

Lucifer: (annoyed) Oh, great, if it isn't the Radio Demon himself.

Alastor: (calmly) No need to be so rude, Your Highness. That's no way to treat a living being.

Lucifer: (annoyed) Oh, yeah, right. Says the overlord who owns souls.

Alastor: (mockingly) Well, when you put it like that, you make me sound like a villain.

Lucifer: (annoyed) Okay, freakface, what do you want?

Alastor: (calmly) Oh, Your Highness, always making the craziest claims. No wonder Lilith divorced you and made a deal with Adam.

Lucifer: (confused) What did you say?

Alastor: (calmly) You heard me, dear sir.

Lucifer: (shocked) How do you know about that?

Alastor: (determined) I know many things you and anyone in this hotel don't. Now, unless you want to reveal to your dear daughter that her mother betrayed her and moved to a beach, and crush her dear soul, let's keep this discussion private, shall we?

Alastor laughs as he turns black and melts into the wall, disappearing.

Lucifer: (defeated) You know, maybe talking to Charlie can wait.

Lucifer walks away carefully.

-

Meanwhile, in Heaven, Sir Pentious is engaged in a conversation with Emily in a cafe.

Emily: (excited) So, how is your first month in Heaven, Sir... Pentious, is it?

Sir Pentious: (awkwardly) Good... I guess. This whole thing is still a bit weird, being used to living in Hell and all. Still don't know why you're so happy-go-lucky talking to me all the time, though.

Emily: (excited) It's just who I am, an angel to serve and bring happiness to the community.

Sir Pentious: (awkwardly) That's... nice and all, but don't you think you're going a bit... overboard?

Emily: (concerned) What do you mean?

Sir Pentious: (awkwardly) Nothing personal, but compared to your head angel, you're... a bit childish. I mean, there's nothing wrong with that, but I sense that you're going to get into some trouble, knowing what happened to others who have previously felt sympathy for demons such as myself.

Emily: (excited) But you're not a demon anymore. You got redeemed after Adam killed you.

Sir Pentious: (awkwardly) I guess so, but I'll be careful if I were you. God knows what's in store for you, young lady.

-

In the middle of Heaven itself, in the office of the angel Sera, as the main door opens:

Deerie: (nervously) Ma'am, Gabriel is here to see you.

Sera: (defeated) Let him in.

Deerie disappears as the angel Gabriel enters.

Gabriel: (sternly) I go for one century and return now to find out Adam is dead, and our annual extermination in Hell has become ineffective, and even worse, now everyone in Heaven knows of said extermination.

Sera: (calmly) I understand your anger, Gabriel, but it was a matter beyond my control.

Gabriel: (annoyed) I'm sorry, but wasn't it you who agreed to this scheme?

Sera: (defeated) What is your point?

Gabriel: (determined) I've had a century to myself, and after a little chat with the Lord himself, a new strategy has been approved to eliminate any possible uprisings in Hell and Heaven.

Sera: (surprised) What do you mean by uprisings in Heaven?

Gabriel: (annoyed) I'm talking about your fellow Seraphim angel.

Sera: (realizing) Emily.

Gabriel: (annoyed) Yes, Emily, the young one who's always with you. Who else would I be talking about? She's proving to be... troubling.

Sera: (concerned) Gabriel, she's just naive. She means no harm.

Gabriel: (firmly) Naive or not, we cannot afford disruptions, especially now. The Lord has decreed a zero-tolerance policy. Just ask Lucifer.

Sera: (hesitantly) What do you suggest we do?

Gabriel: (authoritatively) Emily needs to be dealt with swiftly and discreetly. It's for the greater good.

Sera: (nervously) What of this strategy?

Gabriel: (sternly) I have recruited three people to carry out a secret experiment to kill as many sinners as possible. They shall be disguised as sinners to not attract attention. One of them shall also deal with Emily in due time.

Sera: (demanding) What do you mean?

Gabriel: (determined) You'll see.

Gabriel looks out the office window with pure determination...