whatcha listening to? -armin arlert

thirteen

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The silence lurches with our drunk stumbling as Armin and I make our way back to our dorms. I'm continuously racking my brain for something to say, each topic I think of leading me deep into my own thoughts. I almost forget that Armin is with me by the time he speaks up.

"Are you actually okay?" Armin asks.

"Kinda? I mean, I'm a bit shaken up but it's nothing I'll lose sleep over." I answer.

"That's good to hear." Silence falls between us again, the sound of our footsteps on the pavement and slight whir of the outdoor lights filling my ears. A few more moments pass, and then I remember our dancing in the basement before everything went to shit.

"I'm sorry about earlier, in the basement." I start, suddenly ashamed of my actions and emotions from when I was pressed against him. "The song had me really hyped up, and obviously, I was drunk. Even though that's no excuse, I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable."

"Don't be sorry, it was nice to see you let loose a little bit. And I was happy to join you." He replies, and a smile grows on my face. "If anyone should be apologizing, it's me. I'm sorry for grabbing you the way I did." At this, I look up to him in the dim lights from the side of the sidewalk, watching as his face turns to red.

"Oh, that's okay. I didn't think there was anything wrong with it." I answer, carefully selecting my words. "It was noisy, and I didn't hear you, so it makes sense for you to pull me closer. I had a nice time dancing with you." I need to let him know that I was perfectly okay with him grabbing me. Well, more than okay but that's none of his business.

"I wish we had been able to dance a little while longer." Armin replies, and I'm grateful that he decided to move on from our physical contact. If the conversation continued that way, he'd be left with zero doubt that I had a crush on him.

"Me too, but there will be countless parties for us to let loose at." I say, using his previous words. My eyes are still trained on Armin as we continue walking, and he turns his head to meet my gaze. As usual, heat settles on my cheeks, and a smile forms on his face as if he notices. I tear my eyes away, and find that we're now in the courtyard between our respective dorms.

"Hold on." Armin says, coming to a stop beside me and pulling his phone out of his pocket. I comply, turning to face him as he furiously taps on his phone. After a moment, sweet music pours from his phone as he looks at me. "Do you know this song?"

"No, I don't." I reply after taking a moment to listen to the tune before recognizing Frank Sinatra's honey- like voice gracing my ears. A beaming smile grows on Armin's face and he winks at me before setting his phone on the sidewalk.

"May I have this dance?" He asks, holding his hand out to me. My mouth falls open, and I quickly bring my hand to my face to hide my shock. Despite the situations we've found ourselves in, I'm still taken aback by his boldness peeking through his typically meek demeanor.

I realize he's still waiting for an answer, or my hand at the very least, and mechanically shut my jaw before extending my arm to touch his palm with my fingertips. Just like every time before, electricity or heat or whatever it is jolts through my fingertips and into my whole body, flooding me with elation.

"We only had one dance, and I- for one, am far too tired for the energetic music that's played at parties." Armin says as he grasps my hand and pulls me closer to him. I'm still in shock, unable to speak, and his grip on my hand loosens as he notices the tension I hold throughout myself.

"It's okay, if you don't want to dance, I understand it's been a long night. I don't mean to make you uncomfortable, or push you to do something you don't want to do. I'd like to dance, and it's selfish of me to assume that you'd like to as well, I'm-" His rambling is cut by my squeezing his hand, and quickly bringing my other hand to his shoulder, placing myself firmly in front of him.