Bride For 7 Months (Halal Love Story) ( #Book 1 Of Brides Of Ozturks series)

Chapter 19__His Feelings

Abdul Razzaq's POV-

I was in my office, avoiding everyone like a plague.
I don't want people coming to me and asking me what I've decided.
Including my family.

I don't particularly care about anyone's opinion on it.
Except Kulsum.

Everything in my life is so overwhelming and frustrating.

I typed onto my computer, the clicking sound intensified as my fingers moved abruptly on the keyboard taking all my frustrations out.

There is nothing to think about. I'm going to deny the proposal. That's it no questions.

The reason I didn't say 'no' right there and then it's because Mr. Baris is a very sneaky man.

I cannot risk anything. If he gets offended, everything will suffer.
My company, business, reputation and most importantly my family.

So I need a good and a polite way to turn down his offer.
It would've been rude and would've hurt his ego if I'd deny immediately.

Although I wanted to deny immediately, but I can't.

And the another reason is.....Kulsum.
Of course marrying Esra has nothing to do with Kulsum.

If I wanted to marry Esra I would have, regardless of Kulsum already being my wife.

Or so I thought....because maybe, I would marry Esra if Kulsum meant nothing to me.

After all, I married Kulsum because of business affairs as well.
If someone asked me to marry Esra a few months ago regardless of Kulsum being my wife.....I would have.

But now, it feels wrong. What's happening is wrong. It's not fair to her.

I know I can have a second wife, but I don't want to. It's not cheating but it felt like it.

I can't be with someone else knowing she's not with me.

And the reason I'm feeling this is because she means something to me.

But that's not the only reason. I also hanged them on a cliff hanger because I wanted to see how Kulsum felt about this.

Of course no woman wants her husband to have a second wife but Kulsum is no mere woman.

When I proposed her the deal about 7 months.....she agreed, that's obviously because I don't mean anything or maybe our relationship means nothing to her.

And frankly so didn't she in the beginning but now......I'm having second thoughts.

And probably she does too, she might act tough around me and everyone, hangs out with Emir and maybe even cheated on me.

But I could sense her in her eyes that she does care. She cares about me. About our relationship.

But everytime I think that our relationship is mending, she pulls out a new stunt which makes me doubt her....and us.

But this time.....I had to be sure. I cannot risk anything.
It cannot be one sided. That's how it is.

You get attached to someone, they mean a lot to you, then they break you, your trust and leave you.

Turns out they never cared for you in the first place.

I've been through this earlier and I don't want to experience it again.

That's why I'm always cautious. I need to know what she feels about this.
About me, about us.

And until I don't get my answer and assurity, I'm not putting anything into action.