helluva boss/hazbin hotel fanfic-Devils lettuce

🍺MASQUERADE 🍺

We see an unconscious Angel tied to a chair in a dark room. He wakes up to look at his surroundings while trying to free his hands. Suddenly, a large hell bound walks up to him with a knife.

Hellhound: finally awake, Angel dust?

Angel:yeah, what's it to ya?

Hellhound:[grabs hair] I want you to tell me where your boss stashes his vault.

Angel:[laughs] its hilarious you think I'd tell you anything.

Hellhound: fine![grabs angel] I guess I'll just have to FUCK the information outta ya.

Angel:[determined] do your worst....[smirk]daddy.

Quickly, the hellhound rips off his shirt to dog pile Angel in submission. We then see everyone in the lobby watching Angel's porn with looks of shock and disgust.

Angel: ya know, this performance won me a 'Sex-x-x-i' award.

Charlie:[embarrassed] its, uh...very...honest?...oh[looks away]

Vaggie:[annoyed]Ew.

Angel[television]: harder daddy

Y/N:okay! Enough of this. Angel, what the fuck?

Angel: what? Charlie said it was "show n' tell" day.

Y/N: Ya, I know. I SHOWED [holds pink ribbon] this and TOLD you the story of how I took care of my mom before she passed from chemotherapy. And if I'm being honest, I'd rather go back to talking about that......then watch THIS[points at TV]

Angel: Well, this is my best film. It was the first one to get me a win over that bitch,[fluffs chest] Tiffany titfucker.

Suddenly, we hear Husk speak up from the bar. Y/N looks over to see Husk doing his daily duties by cleaning glasses.

Husk: ya know, not a very convincing interrogation scene.

Angel: [rolls eyes]alright, dickhead. What makes you think you have any right to insult my work to my fuckin face?

Husk: you really gonna sit there and act like these scripts ain't got garbage?

Angel:[gasp] fuck you, this is classy art![points at TV]

The televise shows the hellhound slapping angel's while literally eating it. Y/N and Sir Pentious cover there eyes to hide from the horrors in front of them.

Husk: that's bullshit, you get drunk and bitch about them all the time. Everyone likes to bitch to the bartender. I know everything about you and these motherfuckers here at this point. That one[points at Pentious] is an insecure baffoons whose lonely ass watches you idiots when you sleep. Princess, is a bleeding heart who wants to solves everyone else problems expect for her own.

Charlie: what?! No...i...ugh...no

Husk: Y/N is a scared cursed mommas boy who relies on Hemp to control his inner demon.

Y/N:hmmmm.....sad, but true[drinks hemp tea]

Husk:This one[points at vaggie] judges everyone and everything because she hates herself.

Vaggie:[annoyed]Augh.

Husk: And nifty, shit.......you don't even wanna know what her deal is.[drinks booze]

Angel:[laughs] You weren't kidding, haha wow! Kittens git claws, meow.[Holds huskers face]

Husk:[pissed] AND YOU, don't get me started. I see right through you and all this bullshit and how fake you are.

Angel:[laughs] Me fake? Wow, I had no idea. Guess that's why I'm an actor, dumbass. And...[hell phone rings]...hold that thought.[awnsers hellphone] hello? Uh..ya I'm... Just...no I'm not, but I....[scared] YA! I'll be Right there.[hangs up phone] Well, looks like Val needs me to do an emergency shoot.