My Reason To Live {Under Editing}

{2-9}

I woke up at nine in the morning, and I saw Dean standing the shirtless with a big white teddy and bouquet of pink roses.

"Awe, babe! You didn't have to." I say, taking the bear from him. "Actually, you did have to. Is this all you got me?" I asked. It better be not because I bought him a gift that left my wallet crying, including me.

"Relax, it's not." He said and placed the bouquet on a chair and got on top of me. "Mmm babe, I'm still sore from last night." I said. He just kissed my lips. "I just wanted to kiss my fiance." He says against my lips.

He laid down next to me and pulled my bear out of my hands. "So.. what are you going to name it?" He asked. "Mr Cuddles." I said with a smile on my face. "Seriously?"
"Yes, seriously, it's a cute name. Plus, I'll cuddle him when you have a game to play." I said.

"Lexa is old enough to go to my games." He said and shrugged. "Yeah, but Ollie isn't." I said, and he sighed. "One day we'll all go see you play." I said and kissed his cheek.

"Now I have to go take a shower." I said, getting up. "Wait for me!" Dean said. "Nooo." I sang. I walked to the bathroom and took a bath.

After I finished, I brushed my teeth and did my skincare.

I went back to the room, and I saw Dean standing outside on the balcony thinking. I walked over to him and wrapped my arms around his waist, hugging him.. "What are you thinking about?" I asked.

"Just wondering what life would be like if we gave our lives to God." He said, looking. I got confused. "What do you mean?" I asked.

"My feed has been filled with Christian videos. I just want a life filled with God, but I'm not sure I can with all the ungodly things I've done. I already know that I've found my Eve, but I also wanna find God." He said. "I have this void in my soul, and I feel like only God can fill it up." He said.

I couldn't help but smile. I don't know much about about Christianity but I'm willing to learn so I can get to know God, strengthen my relationship, and be a good mother to my child, and be a good wife to my future husband.

"Why don't we spend valentines Day reading the Bible at the park?" I suggest. He smiled and nodded his head. "Let me go get dressed." I said, leaving him. "I'm going to go take a shower." Dean said and went to the bathroom.

I got dressed into a pair of boyfriend jeans, a black tee I got from Dean. I did my hair and applied minimal makeup because we're just going out for breakfast.
I wore my white airforce and my baseball cap.

I took my phone and saw a bunch of pictures of Lexa and Ollie that Del sent to me

Awe, I miss those two already.

Dean walked off the bathroom with a towel around his waist and his hair wet.

"Hey, what's up?" He asked, still drying his hair with a towel in his hands. "Del just sent me pictures of Lexa and Ollie, and I miss them even more ." I said, looking at my babies.

I know Ollie isn't my own child, but he's still my baby.

Dean sat next to me and placed his arm around m,  shoulder and rubbed it. "Don't worry, we'll see them tomorrow." He said. I rested my head against his chcomfortede comforts me.

"You should probably get dressed before we're late." I said. "But I wanna hold you longer, " He said, and I looked up and gave him the 'mom stare'

"Fine, I'll do it." He said, getting up.

He got dressed into black cargo pants, grey air jordans, and a white tee. He grabbed his sunglasses and put them on and his baseball cap.

"I'm going to call a cab." Dean said, getting his phone, and I nodded my head.

I was confused. Why does he want to be a Christian all of sudden. Last night, we were doing the dirty, and now he wants to have God in his life? I'm not complaining and all, I'm just confused.

I also want to turn myself to God, but I've done a lot of sinful things, and i don't know I I'll be accepted into this life. I had a child at eighteen, and I'm not married yet for crying out loud. I followed the world instead of Jesus .

I drank, I had sex, I disobeyed my parents, I fell into temptation, and I let anger take over me. I'm also a huge liar. I lied to my parents, siblings, friends, my fiancé, and myself. So now I'm wondering if I'll be forgiven.

"Dev!" Dean called me while shaking me. "Hmm, what!" I asked, looking up. "Get your bag. The car is almost here." He said, and I nodded my head and grabbed my tote bag.

Dean looked at me with a concerned look. "What?" I asked. "What were you thinking about?" He asked. "What are you talking about?" I asked, grabbing my sweater in case the weather changed. "You looked like you were going to cry." He said. "I was just thinking." I said said. "Anout what?" He asked.

"I'll tell you tonight. Let's just enjoy today." I said. He nodded his head and held my hand as we walked out of the hotel room. He locked and we left the the building.

We got into the Uber and we went to this fancy café.

We got inside and ordered our food. "Dev , I've been thinking..." Dean starts and I mentally groaned. I know where this conversation is heading. "Why don't we buy a house? The apartment is getting crowded and the house could be in dallas so I won't have to be so far away from you guys." He said. I knew it.

"Dean..." I sighed. "You know what?" I said thinking. "Let's get that house. It should be after the wedding though. And it has to be a beach house." I said.

I do want a house, and I also want to be a house wife.

Dean smiled like a little child. "Really? I'm so glad you said yes." He said holding my hands. I smiled and he kissed me. I kissed back and after a few seconds I pulled back. "I love you." He said. "I love you too."