A Hand is Not a Heart

To be With Child

Her heart felt heavy in her chest. For a moment she didn't know what to do with herself. Going back to sleep felt wrong. Sitting still felt wrong. Reading a book felt wrong. Everything felt wrong. Everything felt wrong because he wasn't here.

She had to occupy herself with something because her mind was going places it shouldn't. It went to thinking her husband disliked her, to thinking her husband went on a dangerous mission, to thinking her husband was dead. She felt sick. Why did her mind always have to go to the darkest of places? It made her want to throw up. Wait. No. She actually needed to throw up.

Dashing through the door, she threw herself on her knees in front of the toilet and puked her stomach empty. With it came tears of confusion and anxiety. She didn't understand anything that was happening tonight. A few hours ago she felt like the happiest woman on earth and now she was a hopeless mess.

"Petronella? What's going on? Are you ill?" Her husband's worried voice spoke from the dooropening as she heard him rush inside. He kneeled down next to her and stroked her back gently.

Immediately, her anxiety diminished and her mind calmed. She turned her head to look at him. "Severus?" She asked. "Where were you? You were gone when I woke up and I thought that-"

"I'm back." He interrupted. "Don't worry about me, flower. What happened to you? You don't look well."

She lowered herself to her butt and leaned against the wall. With tears on her cheeks she looked at him. "I don't know, I just felt nauseous."

The immediate concern in his dark brown eyes made her feel safe and cared for. She was happy he was back and unharmed. And he obviously hadn't suddenly stopped loving her. "Come. Let's get you some water." He said as he wrapped his arms around his wife and pulled her up slowly. He walked her to his sofa and disappeared into the kitchen.

When he returned with a glass of water, he saw that his wife had calmed down a little. At taking a closer look however, she looked rather sad. So he raised his eyebrows and looked at her like he would a bad student, hoping to lighten the mood. "Now tell me honestly... have you been drinking, mrs. Snape?"

She looked at him questioningly for a moment. Then the corners of her mouth lifted. Her gorgeous eyes turned amused instead of sorrowful. "You've got me." She smiled. After taking a sip from her water she felt her nausea slowly ebb away. "Thank you... for the water."

He nodded. His stare slowly traveled down towards her belly and then he wondered if it could be. His heart skipped a beat at the thought of it. Could his wife be carrying their child? Not wanting to spend another second pondering the possibility, he pulled out his wand and held it above his wife's belly.

"What are you-"

Suddenly her belly began to glow. A warm orange light seemed to come from the inside of her body. She stared at it in awe. "Severus... does this mean what I think it does?" Her wide eyes traveled up to look into her husband's.

"It does." He stated. Then a smile tugged on the corner of his lips. "No more drinking for you, flower." He teased. His arm wrapped around her shoulders and pulled her against him. A loving kiss was pressed on the top of her head as she leaned against him. Her trembling hand searched for his and gently grabbed it. "I'm pregnant." She stated.

He smiled even though she couldn't see. "You are." Turning his hand around, he engulfed hers and squeezed it reassuringly. "You are going to be fine, Petra. I will make sure of it."

"I'm frightened." She whispered while placing a hand on her belly and staring at it.

"Me too." He whispered back. "But I've got you... and you've got me."