Hard Fi Resist | Editing

29- Bad Blood -

"Mi cya believe she dead,"

Tears were streaming down my face and I didn't even bother to wipe my cheeks.

Mommy sat next to me, rubbing my back; as Kacy stood in the corner watching me.

The surgery wasn't as successful as we thought. It had caused internal bleeding and all this time I thought the doctors could save her.

I flung the bottle of water down, feeling anger surge through me. Is like everywhere mi turn, people a dead round mi.

That's when the front door opened. I got the regualr whiff of Raye's perfume and knew it was her.

"A wah?" She questioned.

She slumped in the sette in front us. I looked up to see she was in one of those dresses pregnant women wear. Her stomach had gotten bigger.

"Fiona dead. She did get shot." Kacy told her.

"Oh..." Raye dragged.

"Everything happen fi a reason, baby," Mommy wiped my face with her hands.

Fool fool advice. Wah coulda be the point in Fiona dying?

I sniffled and wiped my eyes.

"Yuh can help dem?" I asked Raye.

"Help who?" She asked in confusion.

"Her family want a lawyer fi get di man weh shot her,"

Raye looked at me with indifference.

"And like how a crime yuh focus pon, yuh coulda help them investigate and find the man,"

I was just chatting. Crime in Jamaica never gets solved.

"Mi see di man weh shot her," I tried to convince her.

"Yuh did di there?" She asked me.

"The man did a bother wi earlier. Ah can him come back and shot her,"

"Mi nuh wan get involve," Raye stated.

"But yuh a lawyer,"

Wah kinda lawyer nuh wan get involve ina crime? Mek it mek sense.

"Mi understand her Jordan," Mommy rubbed my hair. "It's a lot of stress to take on a case like that while she pregnant,"

"But all she go do ah help police investigate and bring in the man," I pulled my head from her hand, feeling a bit more agitated.

"Is like the only time yuh member mi a when yuh want mi fi do sumn fi yuh," Raye spat, staring me with coldness.

Bloodclaat big back gal. Imagine somebody dead and she a mek everything bout herself.

"Only time me member you?" I rolled my eyes. "Raye yuh ever remember nobody? The only person yuh care bout ah yuhself,"

"And that's why mi naw help yuh," she spat, gritting her teeth.

I stood up from the settee and turned to exit the house. Heat forming from my face. That's when a bright idea popped up in my head.

So I turned back to her.

"That's why mi fuck Bigga,"

The shock on her face brought me a momentary feeling of victory but guilt was still beating me in my back.

I heard Mommy gasp and I didn't even glance at her.

I turned to go to the door until I felt someone yank my braids, pulling me back.

"Fucking dutty whore," Raye yelled.

Is like she a try pull out mi braids from outta mi head. And if mi lick her back, dem go seh mi wicked.

"Unuh stop," Mommy came between us. "Unuu stop wid di fighting. Why unu cya live in peace?"

"Dis a di second man she a try tek from me," Raye pointed at me.

Second man? I was momentarily confused until my brain finally registered what she meant.

"Wi a did fifteen. How mi did fi know di bwoy like me?"

All this time she a carry grudge from wi a fifteen?

"Yuh cya keep yuh rass foot dem lock," she walked towards me.

Mi swear if she touch mi, mi go give her a lick mek she go ina labour.

"Unu stop di fighting," Mommy yelled.

She swayed on her feet as if she was about to fall. I grabbed hold of her.

"Mommy yuh alright?" Kacy rushed over to us.

We put her to sit in the sofa.

Mommy look disoriented.

"Unuh a go kill mi off?" She said breathlessly, breaking out into sweat. "Why unuh cya just get along? Man more important than unuh relationship?"

I stood up and exited the house without glancing back. I got in my car and began speeding back to my apartment.

When I got there I started packing my clothes and other essentials. I put them in boxes and began bringing them downstairs to my car.

Eventually, my car was packed with boxes. I pulled out the parking lot and began driving back to country.

Rain was beginning to fall. Funny how the weather shows exactly how I feel on the inside.

I made it to Grandma's house. I ran outside to pull the gate, feeling my clothes become soaked.

I drove into the yard just as Grandma made her way onto the verandah. She was in a long yellow dress and had a towel wrapped around her shoulder.

I got out of the car and began walking to the steps.

"Come outta the rain," she yelled. "Horace, Jordan deh here,"

I made it to the steps and threw my arms around her. I couldn't stop the tears from flowing.

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