Indebted

35

After a slightly awkward quarter of an hour, where Esti abandoned the coke after the single sip, to try the iced tea, only to find it was somehow almost more sweet than the coke had been. Switching to the sprite for a sip before deciding that water was all she wanted.

Priscilla returned with an even larger tray than the one she had used for the drinks. Setting the mammoth sized tray on an adjacent, empty table, and transferring all the hot fresh food to the table, Theo thanked her and she was on her way, letting them know if they needed anything to "Just hollar out". A phrase which made no sense to Esti. But she wasn't going to say anything that might stress Joe out again.

It looked like a human movie buffet had sprung to life in front of Esti. She loved french fries, both with mayo and ketchup to dip them in. Separately. Not together. Having experimented quite a bit. The cheeseburger was so much better than her mind had dreamed possible. It was no wonder so many people ate a cheeseburger in a movie. Onion rings were crispy, and a perfect blend of salty, savory, sweet on her tongue. Fried potato skins covered with cheese, green new onions and diced tomato, broiled until the cheese was toasted on top but gooey underneath was her favorite.

Chicken nuggets were battered, apparently dinosaur shaped, and amazing dipped in honey. But the best, had been the al dente macaroni pasta, smothered in a savory, rich cheese sauce, baked with crunchy bread crumb and cheese topping until the perfect crisp bite was added to the dish. A savory dream. Until the buttery, rich garlic bread hit her tongue. It was amazing. All of it. Esti had never eaten so well or so rich. Everything tasted so good, she knew she was probably eating more than her share on a couple of the plates. Esti didn't care. She just wanted to be full. To eat things that made her feel happy.

Anything to briefly ignore how Atticus was so happy she was away from him. How much his implied rejection was hurting her. She wasn't a quitter, the one time she had resigned herself to death, was when Atticus had saved her. A stabbing pain through her heart, thinking that he might have saved her, only to abandon her. She knew she needed to eat. Was trying to enjoy foods she had never tasted. Focus all her attention on the food.

Joe and Theo were more than good company. Esti felt safe with them, knew they were going to do their best by her, on behalf of either Nigella or Norman. Esti wasn't old. Her life was barely lived. She wanted to feel young and carefree like the people in movies always seemed to exist in. Her life experience made that hard. Esti felt her broken heart pang again. She had thought Atticus would show her a different kind of life. 

Pushing down her heartbreak; Esti ate, eventually drank the sweet sodas, and just tried to feel full on food instead of the empty feeling that was haunting her in the space Atticus should be. Ignoring the feeling of how happy he was to be apart from her. 

Esti didn't know she was crying, until Theo dabbed a tear from her eye with a paper napkin, tucking it into her hand. "If your mate is glad for the distance between you, know it is only because he thinks you safer the farther away you get." Theo whispered, directly into her ear. Dispelling the fears she couldn't say out loud. "He's right. Magnus is in an awful mood." Theo told her.

Joe shuffled in his seat. Esti angled her face to look at him. "Theo knows what he is talking about." This time Esti could tell there was sadness in the loaded look they shared silently, a memory or history that was none of Esti's business to intrude upon.

Joe pushed the onion rings towards Esti as she dabbed her eyes. Esti saw a flash of motion in the curved corner mirror. Priscilla was coming back to check on them. "How is that all tasting- Oh my word! Poor sweet thing, what could make such a pretty girl like you cry?" Priscilla asked, words all tumbling over each other. Only realizing she had intruded, and been rude all at once after everything was already said.