Make your own kind of Music | A Shubman Gill x Ishan Kishan Fanfiction

Faded

You were the shadow to my light

Did you feel us?

Another star, you fade away

Afraid our aim is out of sight

Wanna see us, alive

***

Shubman ditched the rest of practice and dinner and paced outside Ishan's room for hours and hours. Their teammates kept dropping in all over the evening to check on Ishan. Shubman tried to listen in at the door for Ishan's voice, but he not dare make himself too obvious.

He wouldn't be able to defend questions like what he was doing outside and why he was not just going into his own room, which people like Virat bhaiya and Shreyas would be sure to ask.

He would have gone in. He would have. It was his room, too.

If he dared.

If he wasn't scared he'd actually make Ishan's condition ten times worse.

***

It was wiser to wait for Ishan to call him.

It was also wise not to stay the night in anyone else's room, that would bring on a barrage of questions. He chose a quiet, hidden bench in the lawns of the hotel to wait.

He kept himself awake. Or rather, he couldn't sleep even if he tried to. Firstly, the bench was hard, and secondly he was worried he might miss a call from Ishan.

"You're a grown up, Shubman, surely you can act like it sometimes. I'm sick of holding you straight all the damn time."

He was pretty sure Ishan wouldn't let him stay outside the whole night, and he wanted to show him that he could be an adult about the matter and give him space.

"I'm sick of taking decisions for you like you're a goddamned kid."

And there. This was his own decision. To give space to a friend who had just broken up instead of going and pestering him.

"To know that you'd have needed some emotional intelligence!"

At that point, he was resigned he must not have any emotional intelligence, because he didn't even know what that meant.

He'd overlook that bit for the time being.

"Will you please leave me alone and let me breathe? Please?"

Yes. Yes, he was doing that.

He was staying away so that Ishan could breathe.

He'd go only when Ishan called him.

"Yes, I'll call you, if I need someone to make things ten times worse than they already are."

Shubman curled up on the bench, even if it was hard and bumpy and uncomfortable. He felt drained out from inside. All that shouting and fighting would drain anyone.

He wondered how drained Ishan and Aditi would be feeling, broken up from a four year long relationship.

He almost started to get up. He had to check if Ishan was ok.

"Yes, I'll call you, if I need someone to make things ten times worse than they already are."

"Will you please leave me alone and let me breathe? Please?"