Astarion x Reader

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pairing : astarion x (gn) reader

summary : astarion has travelled by your side for weeks and it makes his stomach churn when he grows to trust you, the trust turns into something more and he feels even worse.

warnings : astarion's scars, reader is injured.


For weeks Astarion had been travelling by your side. And for weeks he was under the impression he was only using you to get to Baldur's Gate safely. You were a powerful ally, an asset to his plan of revenge.

He would stand by your side, of course, and watch your back as you had always watched his. But he couldn't hold back how aggravating you were, you didn't care whether he approved of your decisions or not. You made your own, walked your own street, and he was forced to follow it if he wanted to keep you around.

And for weeks he had watched you talk your way out of situations, or convince a trader to give you free supplies. A master with your words. He watched as you lied and manipulated, and it made his faith in you soar.

But then you would turn around and help a helpless child or a person that meant nothing to you, and his respect for you wavered. Why did they deserve any of your help? It's not like they helped you in any way. And they definitely wouldn't help you the same way you chose to help them if it were you stranded on the side of the road with no help. They would leave you, he was sure of it. He would, just like everyone had done to him, no one was deserving of your help if they had nothing to give you in return.

So constantly you would find yourself in front of him, as he yelled at you and glared down at you with fire burning behind his eyes. He was tired of wasting time with people who didn't matter. "Must you stop to help every worthless person we find on the side of the road?" His voice is venomous and unimpressed. It's not the first time he has made a complaint, and him continuing to be unacknowledged was becoming more and more irritating each time he tried.

"You'd regret saying that if it was you on the side of the road, and we left you to grovel in your own misery." Your arms are crossed, disciplinary stare on your face like he's a child. He hates it.

It's not like anyone ever stopped to help him in the past.

Too generous. Too kind.

Sure it gave you allies, and more often than not they would reward you for your good deed. But still, you could've killed them and taken it from their cold, dead body. Or he could've pickpocketed them for you, no time wasted.

Astarion only feels his opinion change when your actions begin to affect him and not just the strangers you pass by through your travels.

Suddenly he feels himself growing overwhelmingly close to you. Close enough that he feels he's safe to tell you about Cazador and the threat he may play in your life in the future, and in a moment of privacy, just you and him, he offers to show you the scars on your back. You're not sure what to say at first, you just stare and it makes his skin crawl with insecurity.

He shivers when your fingers meet his back to trace along the lines, "He did this?" He can only nod, embarrassed by this moment of transparency and weakness. God forbid he try to speak and all that comes out is a wobbly, pathetic cry where a snide comment laced with sarcasm should be.

You grab his shoulder to turn him around, holding both his hands in your own with a tightness that has his skin crawling in a different way. "I won't let him hurt you again, we won't, all of us, you'll never have to fight him alone. We'll help you, no matter what," Your thumbs swipe across the skin of his pale and shaky fingers and it sends heat up his cold arm, "I'll help you."

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