✓ | Words I Live By. Hazel Callahan

Nine, Heartbreak Makes The Heart Ache

            Hazel couldn't help the tears that sprung in her eyes. Had she been cheated? Lied to? Had Estelle had a boyfriend this entire time? Hazel quickly wiped a tear that threatened to fall. She fell back against the car, leaning her head against it.

            "Hey, loser, get away from there!" Hazel looked up to the booming sound of Jeff Morrigan's excruciating voice. He stood towering over her with that oh-so-irritating smug face. "We're shooting here, so get lost." A pebble was thrown her way, making Hazel scurry away rapidly.

She put her earbuds back in her ears. This time, her music was most doubled in volume, in an attempt to drown out what she just saw. Hazel was like a ghost, roaming the halls of Rockbridge Falls High School. No one spoke to her. Her gaze was stuck in front of her. Hazel lived in a blur.

            The rest of the day, Hazel would have to try and get the image of Estelle and that guy kissing. Though... how could she? When the picture was already burning into the core of her existence.

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Estelle had never not looked forward to the club, but when she spoke momentarily with Josie about the plans for today, she sure as hell wasn't so excited about it anymore. They'd decided to follow through with Hazel's proposal and take a meeting to share personal experiences with the group. Estelle wasn't too fond of this subject.

"So, we know that the club has been a place where we can feel empowered physically, but we also thought it could be a safe space and a place where we can open up and talk about our feelings." Josie opened the meeting.

PJ spread her arms. "Okay, so who's been raped? Just, you know, raise your hand."

Estelle saw a few girls hesitate to put their hands up. No one was going to be the only one to confess. PJ must've known that as well. "Grey area stuff counts too." She added.

Then, the hand of pretty much every girl in the room shot up in the air. Estelle's eyes were only on Hazel — whose hand went up surprisingly fast — as she lifted her own arm. Now, not a single hand was still laying in the girls' lap.

"Everybody knows the situation with my stepdad," Sylvie decided to begin. "He's just obsessed with Friday movie nights. I mean, God, I get it, you're my new stepdad, but... fuck, whatever. You know?"

"Every time I call the police about my stalker, they tell me to fill out an online form. And then the form tells me to call, so I call and then they say they can't get involved until he tries to kill me," Stella-Rebecca added. She had a sort of humorous tone in her voice, though Estelle was sure that was just a coping mechanism. "And he keeps saying he's going to... but that doesn't count. So, it's, like, annoying."

Estelle's eyes visibly widened at Stella's story. She was aware of the fucked up system America had, but this she wasn't aware of. No wonder girls never call the police about what happened to them.

PJ nodded in her direction. "Been there," She said. "We've all been there." She most certainly had not been there.

"Well, I've been assaulted, like, a million times," Brittany raised her hand when she started speaking. "But I'm more annoyed that everyone knows me for being beautiful and popular and no one knows that I'm actually smart and super driven. Like, I literally own a jewellery business and no one talks about it!"