If Someday Never Comes

Chapter 14

Brooks's POV 

I feel like I've been walking around eggshells everywhere I go for days. It's been a week since Sydney has been back in town and I already feel like my world is being turned upside down. I have done everything I can to avoid her so that leaves me with being at my apartment, Courtney's place, or the office. I have even had to resort to cooking so that I don't run into her at The Tavern. It's really getting old. 

When I ran my dishwasher last night it made a god-awful noise, probably because it hadn't been used in months. Everything feels so upside down and all I can do is keep busy until after Christmas when she is back in North Carolina where she belongs. 

I was currently pacing my apartment waiting for Jake and Sam to get here to watch the game. They were bringing a pizza and I'd never been more grateful. I fucking hated cooking. 

We had polished off the large pizza and as I gathered all the trash, placed it on the counter, and walked to the fridge, I called out to the guys, "Anybody want a beer?" 

Sam responded with a quick, "Yeah" and Jake followed with a "Nah, I'm good man." 

As I walked back and handed Sam his beer from behind the couch I glanced over to Jake who was grinning from ear to ear, his phone in his face as his thumbs moved furiously across the screen. 

"Who's got you so fucking giddy?" I chuckled and Sam went stiff as he looked at Jake, then me, and then back at Jake. 

Without his eyes leaving his phone, Jake followed up with the answer, "Syd." 

I held onto the couch cushions as I tried to gain equilibrium. I felt Sam's eyes on me and Jake's oblivion left me free to process whatever this feeling was that was radiating through my body. Images of Jake and Sydney together flashed through my mind and my blood went cold. I had no right to have an opinion about whether or not they got together but the idea of it made the unsteadiness I felt before welcome in comparison to the ache that was settling into my chest. I wanted them both happy but the fuck if I wanted them happy together. It was too much. 

Jake finally noticed my silence and he turned to me, "You good? I thought you were cool with me asking her out?" 

I cleared my throat and shrugged my shoulders as Sam tried hard to act as if all his attention was on the game. "Yeah, whatever man. She won't be here long, do your thing." I forced. 

"Yeah maybe but," Jake grinned again, "She's the kind of girl you pack up and move a few states away for." 

That was a low blow, even for Jake. I stood up tall and clenched my fists at my sides and my jaw to prevent myself from telling him to get the fuck out of my apartment. 

"What the fuck man," Sam said, his jaw nearly on the floor. 

Jake sat up further on the couch and threw his hands out a smile still covering his face, "What? You know you're my boy Brooks but you dumped her five years ago, your ENGAGED in case you forgot. I've had a thing for her since we were kids. I checked with you before I asked for her number even when I didn't need to. We're fucking adults for Christ's sake!" I watched his smile transition to something more serious, "If you've got a problem with it, you should have spoken up and you probably shouldn't be marrying someone else, just saying." 

I knew he was right, I knew it in my bones but something deeper inside of me felt like it was being ripped to shreds. I was usually so good at leading with my head but when it came to Sydney and everything she made me feel in my heart it became harder and harder to control. So I did the only thing I knew how and I deflected, "I just don't want you to get hurt, man." 

Jake looked at me and knew that was bullshit but thankfully he didn't call me on it. "I'm good, but I think I'm going to head out." 

"Oh come on, the game isn't even half over, " Sam whined. 

"It's cool, I am getting tired and I have a long day tomorrow," Jake said as he stood and fist-bumped Sam and threw me a wave. 

I followed him to the door, "I'm sorry for being a dick." I said softly not wanting Sam to hear my admission. 

"You're good. I know things have always been complicated for you two but I figured five years was long enough for it to be over." 

"It is. I promise." 

"Whatever you say bud, but I'm not giving up. So, may the best man win." he smiled and I knew we were good. 

"He already did. I'm not even in the race fucker." I laughed and slapped his shoulder and closed the door behind him before taking a huge breath. 

"Well, that was fucking awkward." Sam piped up obviously eavesdropping. 

"It's all good. I'm fine with it." I walked back to the couch and fell into the cushions my body feeling as if it weighed 1,000 lbs. 

"You keep telling yourself that pal." 

And without a response, I flipped him the bird and we finished the game only talking if we were yelling at the screen. 

***

I walked into the office on Monday morning to a stack of messages the receptionist had collected from the weekend, my phone on my desk ringing as I listened to a voicemail on my phone, God it was going to be a fucking week already. 

I sat down in the brown leather chair, laid down my phone, and dove into the emails that I'm sure were piling up in my inbox. After an hour of checking emails, checking in with Jake on the pipe that burst in the apartment building we owned in town, and sending out quotes for three new jobs I finally started going through the slips of paper on my desk. I was about halfway through when my heart started to vibrate in my chest. 

Sydney Graves, interested in the old cafe property, 576-555-6734

I read the note three more times and it crumpled in my hand as I clenched the thin paper.

My mind raced for answers, what would she be interested in any information about that property when she would only be here for a few weeks? What would she want with it or plan to do with it? What kind of game was she playing? Maybe she was just trying to fuck with me or maybe...I hesitated before the thought could fully form...maybe, she was moving home? 

A chill crossed my skin and a thump formed in my throat, there's no way, I told myself. She wouldn't, couldn't, how could she? 

The questions piled up like the stack of papers in front of me as I nearly stomped my way to the front, Tinika, the new receptionist looked at me with wide eyes and I did my best to soften the expression on my face, I didn't think it was working. 

"Could you schedule a meeting at the old cafe for Wednesday with Miss Graves?" I asked. 

"Of course Mr. Daw...Brooks." she corrected herself thankfully. I hated being called Mr. Dawson, that was my dad, not me. 

I didn't know what Sydney wanted but I knew the only way to find out was to face her. So that's what I planned to do and whatever ideas were arising in that pretty little head of hers were about to be extinguished. 

If I had any way of stopping her from laying roots in this town, I would, I had to. 

AN: Who else loves to watch Brooksie Boy squirm hahaha *Both hands up!