Behind The Limelight

44: Whatever They Are

Four days.

They were supposed to wrap up the shoot in just four days.

Ashton looked at his calender on his phone, sighing as he saw how booked he was. From photoshoots and shows to auditions and interviews - he was packed for the next month. He didn't doubt that Ryker would be too. If anything, he'd probably be busier than Ashton.

Ashton didn't know what he'd do without knowing for sure that he was going to see Ryker every single day. He had fallen into the routine and adjusted so well, but now it was going to go away and Ashton was having a hard time accepting that.

Ashton and Ryker had done a pretty good job, at least in their opinion, in hiding their whatever-they-were at work. Everyone did notice how much better their chemistry had miraculously gotten both on and off camera, and Erick Tate, especially, was delighted to see that more than anyone.

The two snuck kisses here and there, but other than that they kept their hands to themselves. It worked for them though, because that meant they were only hungrier for each other as the day would come to an end. They would barely make it to Ryker's bedroom before their clothes would come off. Pretty much every room in Ryker's house was christened by them already.

If Tabitha suspected anything, she didn't say a word about it. Maybe she got the hint after her last confrontation with Ashton. She did give a knowing smile or two when the men would be talking to one another, but that no longer scared Ashton.

He wasn't exactly ready to come out, far from it. He wasn't ready for public scrutiny and the media acting like they had the rights to know everything that went on in the actors' bedroom. A part of him also was worried about the reaction of his family.

They had never said anything homophobic in the slightest, and Ashton even had a distant uncle who was gay and he was loved and accepted in the family. But Ashton knew how his parents felt about him already, he figured that this would just become another excuse for them to degrade him.

And as much as Ashton said and pretended like he didn't care, as much as he would gaslight himself into believing the same- sometimes he felt like the same insecure little boy that craved for every ounce of his parents' attention and praise. No matter how terrible and fucked up they were.

Thankfully, Ryker hadn't pushed him into anything. Neither to define the terms of whatever-they-were, nor to come out or go public. From time to time, Ashton did wonder whether this was something that Ryker wanted deep down. But it was too soon for them to be having this conversation, and for now the most important thing was getting done with the shoot.

And one other matter.

"Apparently she showed up at my house again last night," Ashton muttered. "She threatened Vivien but Viv didn't let her in. Viv told her I wasn't home but she kept insisting to check for herself and said she would fire Viv if she tries to stop her."

"Jesus Christ, what makes her think she has the right to fire your employee?" Ryker sighed tiredly, his lips pursed in distaste.

"Exactly! I've blocked seven different numbers of hers and she just keeps getting more. She's been hounding Malcolm at his office too and I'm sure the only reason she's not coming here at the set is because it's too public and she doesn't want everyone to know what a fucking-" Ashton paused, groaning before continuing, "-I don't even know what to call her. My mother's..."

"Insane?" Ryker offered. "Manipulative? Some other words that I'm thinking in my head but don't really want to
speak out loud?"

"All of the above. Check," Ashton replied. They were in Ashton's trailer, and only had a few minutes to spare before they had to get back to work.