Blue Water ~ Lo'ak x OC

~24: Swirling emotions~

Kailua and Lo'ak finally bring their resentful emotions to the surface, arguing in a way that worries many. A complication arises from the surgery.
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https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0ypdkGuQnq83SSSw5JmJzU?si=3e8ef0eb95844818
Snowfall, bad life, if you love someone
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Lo'ak expected the questions following his (admittedly rather dramatic) reveal. A small naive part of him hoped they'd just shut up and leave him alone. Ever since Neteyam had died, they'd been real on his case. If it wasn't his mom asking if he'd eaten enough, it was his dad forcing him to leave the hut to get fresh air.

He didn't want fresh air.
He wanted his brother back.

On top of that now, he had to deal with the sudden and unexpected loss of his unborn daughter. He stared at the wall numbly, cold. He knew what his body was doing; it'd done it less than a week ago on three brothers rocks. Dad called it dissociation; where the brain shuts off to stop the trauma from making irreparable damage. Apparently he'd seen it in the many wars he'd fought in back on earth. More often than not, it only delayed the inevitable.

The repressed trauma would boil and bubble under the surface for days, weeks, months, sometimes even years. Then it would burst over something trivial and useless. Dad said his once burst over the hair bobble (whatever that was) of his sisters snapping.

Lo'ak distantly wondered what his snap would be.

"Lo'ak. Son, listen to me," He turned slowly. "You need to explain what the hell happened," Dad grabbed his shoulders tightly. "Kiri, take Tuk. We need to talk to Lo'ak alone," Mom said, gently pushing his sisters out. Kiri protested, claiming she had a right to know what was going on as the eldest. Lo'ak's snap was that apparently.

The whole ordeal had been a blur, a red haze. He remembered feeling the rage burn in his body and screaming at her that she'd never be the oldest and to not be so disrespectful of Neteyam's name.

She'd certainly left them alone after that.

"Lo'ak." Dad began. He licked his lips, looking at his feet. "What do you mean... your daughter died?" Dad placed his palm against Lo'ak's forehead, to which he rolled his eyes at. "I'm not sick, dad." He swatted the hand away. Mom crouched by his knees. "Maitan?" He cleared his throat. "I mean... Kailua was pregnant. Neither of us knew," He mumbled. "Norm said the shot went through the womb," He finished. Mom gasped. "The baby was... shot?" Lo'ak shook his head softly. "No. The trauma and disruption caused her to miscarry... apparently,"

Dad audibly hesitated. "Are- are you sure she didn't know? It's kinda hard to miss being pregnant, buddy," Mom scoffed. "Ma Jake. Kailua is an intelligent girl; she would not have willingly risked the baby's life in battle," She argued. "Ronal went into battle. She's about ready to pop," Dad argued back. Mom sighed angrily. "I still don't think she would have done that. Ronal is... different in that respect,"

Lo'ak's brain had begun to think. Dad was right... surely she had noticed the pregnancy. "What about her cycles?" Mom asked. Lo'ak raised his brows. "Ew, mom. Why the hell would I ask her that?" Mom shrugged. "Some ladies continue to bleed whilst pregnant," She said. "I bled with you and Tuk." She continued. "In fact, I didn't even know you were coming until the day of, when I woke up in pain,"

Hm. "But Norm said you were a special case, babe. 2 uteruses are incredibly rare in humans, let alone forest na'vi," Dad argued. "Ma Jake, why are you so intent on making Kailua the villain? Hm?" Lo'ak glanced back and forth as dad fought for an answer. "And she is not a forest na'vi. Look at their tales and arms. Who knows what other differences we share?"

~

The funeral took place a few days later. Because it was such a personal affair, only the families went. Unfortunately, due to Kailua's paralysis, she had to sit on a boat with Ao'nung and Tsireya rowing it for her. Thanks to her water breathing abilities, there wasn't the need to help her underneath the waves as they bade goodbye to the covered up baby. As the parents and siblings turned away for respect and Kailua sobbed quietly into her arms, Lo'ak lifted a corner of the blanket.

A dark five fingered hand lay inside.

So the baby would have inherited his demonic features. No doubt Ronal would have blown a blood vessel from it. Nobody uttered a single work as the anemone swallowed her. Neither did anybody speak on the way back to their huts. As he lay awake for the third night after the funeral, thoughts about his daughter and brother meeting in the afterlife keeping him awake, Lo'ak kept coming back to what his dad had said a little over a week ago.

"It's kinda hard to miss being pregnant," He'd said.

The following morning, Lo'ak snuck out of the hut to put his mind at ease. He moved silently through the village; a skill he'd learned in the last two weeks. Moving silently allowed him to get the alone time he desperately craved. More often than not, he'd end up on the cliff side where he and Kailua had begun to court. He'd taken Neteyam there once as well; maybe a few days before Kailua was kidnapped. They'd made it a brotherly thing to go every night; even if they'd fought.

They would sit there, silently, just enjoying the familiar presence. Sometimes Lo'ak would fall asleep by the tree stump and wake up in the hut. Other times he'd wake up to his older brother finally looking at ease for the first time in years.

He crept in through the healing ship and moved to Kailua's room. "You don't need to sneak, Lo'ak," He jumped at the voice. "We're already up and about. So is Lua," A healer said. Lo'ak thanked him quietly, embarrassed that he'd been caught. He knocked on the door that lead into her room and waited.

Just because they'd slept together many (many) times didn't mean either were particularly comfortable with seeing the other naked, or being the one seen naked. "Yeah?" He pushed open the door, closing it behind. "Lo'ak," She said, pushing herself further up the bed.

"Did you know?" He asked immediately. "I'm sorry?" Lo'ak rolled his eyes. "Did you know you were pregnant?" Kailua sighed and rubbed her face. "Obviously not, Lo'ak," She sighed angrily. "What, you really think I'd risk my baby's life in a war that isn't even mine?" She scoffed. "Give me some credibility," Lo'ak couldn't help but snark; "Well nobody knows what the hell goes on in your head, do they?" Kailua narrowed her eyes. "What's that supposed to mean?" She asked. "I'm just saying. You do what you want, when you want." He argued. "I heard how upset you were when you weren't gonna be sent to help fight. How do I know that you didn't know about the baby? Huh? That you weren't just trying to prove yourself?"

Kailua scoffed loudly. "Are you deluded? You do remember that the ONLY reason I was even out that far was because I'd been kidnapped?" She pushed further up in the bed. "If it weren't for that tulkun, I woulda left you and come home!" Lo'ak shook his head. "Nice. Real nice," Kailua growled. "If you've come here to fight, save it. I'm not interested. I'm in enough pain and misery as it is, and I could without you making it worse,"

"Because that's all I do, right?" Lo'ak snapped. "Make everything worse?" Kailua laughed. "Oh my Eywa! STOP being the victim!" She shouted. "I'm allowed to be! MY brother died! MY daughter died! I'm allowed to be the fucking victim if I wanna be!" He shouted back. "OUR daughter! OUR daughter, Lo'ak!" Kailua screamed. "And I'm sorry you lost your brother, I truly am, but do NOT make out that I risked her life!" She added. "If anything, I risked mine to help you both!" She took a breath. "Maybe I'd be ok if I didn't,"

Lo'ak shook his head with a scoff. "I don't believe you. Always making it about you," He hissed. At that point, Lo'ak's mind whispered too far too far too far.

Alas; the damage was done. Kailua's eyes grew dark with unbridled fury and rage.

"Always making it about me? ALWAYS MAKING IT ABOUT ME?!" She screamed. "IN LESS THAN A DAY, I FIND OUT I'M NEVER GONNA WALK AGAIN AND MY DAUGHTER DIED!" She took a shaky breath. "I am fucking PARALYSED, Lo'ak! Do you get that!? I am PARALYSED! From helping YOU!" Kailua screamed. Lo'ak continued to stay silent, chest heaving angrily. "I put my LIFE on the LINE for you and your brother! The least you owe me is a THANK YOU!" She screeched. "WHAT kind of WATER NA'VI CAN'T SWIM!?" She continued, barreling over his voice. A sudden high and frantic beeping interrupted their argument. Kailua grasped at her chest, eyes wide, panicking. Lo'ak's own eyes widened as he stood. "HELP!" He shouted into the hall. "Someone HELP!"

There was a rush and a sudden wave of healers. "I need the ultrasound machine!" One called. He stepped to the side, feeling nauseous. Had he caused this? "Damn it!" One of the healers snapped. "The stitching's gone on the spleen. Radio forward for an emergency splenectomy,"

Lo'ak couldn't help but watch in morbid fascination as Kailua was wheeled away, with various healers screaming warnings and diagnosis's as they moved.