"you sure they don't have anything going on?" someone asked "we're sure" another voice answers "where did my mistake into finding hope became they think that we're deaf?" I asked "your eyes closed, thought you was sleeping" voice 3 answers I sat up yarning flatter my eyes open "why so many people in my room" I asked wait this isnt my room "forget that question..where the fuck am I?" I asked looking around "his room.." riddles sister points next to me I looked over with mattheo there asleep huh huh and am wearing clothes "so much for being a hero.." I got up but flop to the floor "and my legs are dead" I whine the others laugh I held my arm up which flops to the floor someone picks me up "thanks Tommy" I moved my arms around his neck as am on his back "your definitely tired, she complemented you?" joshua said I get handed to someone who is way comfortable "definitely tired.." Tom laughed "shhh t-tired" I wave my hand someone locks it down which I rag it out there grip and moved it around there neck
"ey!" I'm getting poked awake? The fuck we ain't dwarfs "Venessa.." Jordan asked "what!..you quit poking me!" I moved there hands away then looked up at riddle? which I moved off him almost immediately "the hell?" I looked around ok so in the big hall "you? Mr hero, your room? I have my own?" I looked back at mattheo "mine was closer, your welcome.." he rolled his eyes "I don't give to shits never touch me for one and"-"shut the fuck up if it's a big deal I will take you to your room next time."-"Next time? oh wow such heroic of you there isn't gonna be a fucking next time! because like I fucking just said you ain't laying a hand on me" I got up then walked out am not hungry anymore after that prick "..Venessa.." Darcy asked gods sake "I wanna be alone" I asked her "I know, your relationship with mattheo is complicated but give him a chance he really does care about you behind your stubbornness and his" she explains "ever thought it could be someone else?" I turned to her "your not that mad at anyone else other then your brother, you like mattheo using your stubbornness to hide it I know that feeling and i regretted it afterwards" she steps forward "your not as understanding as I thought you was gonna be, I don't want that feeling again I want it gone completely if I like it or not it's just safer for myself" i explained to her "why?, you don't wanna feel the excitement? butterfly's in your stomach?, cheeks blossoming h"-"stop!,no more, not worth the pain" I walked passed her I just kept on walking to the back of the castle flashback "Jason I change my mind, maybe it's too soon to meet my family" I held his wrist "they'll love me, am a loveable person" he smiled I laugh shaking my head and pecked his lips I pulled him into a hug Present ahh fuck! just breathe "Venessa?" mattheo asked "go away.." I sniff looking away from him "have you been crying?, what happened?" oh and all of the sudden caring "just fuck off!" I looked over to him with my brother there to "brilliant.." I got up off the floor "Venessa.." joshua asked I stopped and turned around "you are the reason why am fucking broken, you dare say another word.." I point at joshua "it wasn't his fault he killed your boyfriend" mattheo asked how the fuck does he know that? "yes it was, whatever lies he fed you with..I don't want any involvement in rot in a ditch alive unlike Jason beheaded!blessing out on the hallway" I shout then walked into the castle hiding my face from everyone to my room I throw everything around I stepped back biting my wrist crying I slide down the door balling my eyes out to sleep
next morning
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I get up from my bed to the bathroom having a cold shower, redoing my makeup after wiping the old one off from last night then get ready went to the meeting Standing next to my brother and father next to him as joshua is in the middle mattheo on my left he touches my hand which flinched and shivers all over my body I moved my arm and crossed my arms listening to Voldemort the second he said dismissed I left back to the castle deep breathes deep breathes your a strong woman who don't need men definitely don't need boys who pretend to be men walking down the halls to the big hall eyes shifted into me I went to ravenclaw table sitting next to luna she hugs me "you ok?, I got your message last night" she pulled away I nod "staying distance from any slytherins, I don't wanna here there names or house anything" I explained she nods "might wanna re-think that plan" cho said as her eyes follow them walking in ".." as long I don't talk much and not look nervous everything's fine, shouldn't be nervous I can just find play toys to pass the time
