Pills of love

Dream World (part 5)

Benny closed the door of his silver BMW and stopped to read the latest message from Olaf that arrived on his cell phone about a new restaurant opened in the Vasastan area. He closed the chat and put the phone back in his pocket, taking the last drag on his cigarette before putting it out.

During Frida's first few months back home, he had decided to cut his cigarettes when he realized he was out of breath having to carry her in his arms from room to room. So, he limited himself to the occasional cigarette in the studio or on the drive home, feeling like he was being delicate in not letting her see something that she had completely cut out of her life.

He walked up the driveway to the stone stairs that led to the front door and looked around. He loved their garden, even though he'd been saying for some time now that he wanted to plant some new trees, but never actually did it. Too little time, he really needed a break. Maybe he would pick a few more Jacarandas she loved to add.

On the outside landing, he entered the security code and unlocked the door as he entered. He heard the fast approaching clatter of nails on the wooden parquet and he smiled "Hey, my boy!" he greeted Zappa, who launched at him with his tongue out and his lively sweet eyes "Missed you too" he told him as he caressed him and tried to put an end to his endless attempts to lick his face "Where's Frida? Eh? Where's she?" he asked him, still petting him, but the dog just jumped around him, barking.

Benny took off his vest and jacket and rolled up his shirt sleeves as he moved around the house "Frida?" he called several times, but got no answer. He went around the various rooms of the house, even reaching the first floor, but without finding her. There weren't even the housekeepers around the house.

Benny frowned and took out his phone, his fingers hoovered over the buttons, but he stopped because it seemed so stupid to text his own girlfriend inside their house. So he went back to searching the house until he looked out towards the back garden and saw a figure on the porch. Breathing a sigh of relief, he hurried downstairs.

Benny found her sitting, her favorite sweater on. In reality, it was his sweater, but by now it had become a permanent presence in her wardrobe, so much so that he gave it to her with all the blessings of the case, even if internally he loved to see her almost disappear under the warm wool. She was cute.

He stopped a few seconds watching her, her hair that moved from time to time for some gust of wind. When he hadn't found her inside, an incomprehensible but now constant sense of panic made its way into his stomach, he had never told her, but looking for her and not finding her immediately made him anxious.

"You know, you could leave me a few notes around the house saying where you are. Or even a message on the cell phone. Just to prevent me from having a heart attack" he murmured behind her, not wanting to scare her. In a few steps, he was beside her.

Frida looked up at him and smiled slightly "Sorry" she said in apology and took his hand when he was close enough, bringing his nuckles to her lips as he held tight and stroked her cheek with one finger "I left the phone in the kitchen... I think" she sighed, waiting for him to take a nearby deck chair and bring it closer to hers, without letting go of his hand.

"Why? Usually you always have it with you" he asked as he sat down, in his tone a hint of curiosity and of reproach. She knew she had to always carry it with her, just in case.

"I don't know" she sighed again, looking away "At one point I felt restless and the house seemed... too narrow. I had to distract myself".

"Well, you could have called me to help you out".

She smirked at him with a slight grin on her face and he looked at her feigning innocence. For some time now, they had resumed their flirting banter, trying to find security and tranquility even in that aspect of their life. He had tried in every way to reassure her that her being more delicate, her scar, her insecurities, were all factors that didn't in the least affect her beauty or his attraction to her. But she was uncertain, insecure like never before and so it was up to him, day by day, to make her find the confidence she once had on that too.