A mysterious invitation has been sent to YOU to participate in a survival game show ( THE BTS MAKNAE-LINE Awards ) to win a GRAND PRIZE (Ultimate survivor). The game takes place on an isolated island ( BTS- AWARD- SHOWS account )
Do you have the cou...
Finally! Thank you to all the Team protectors for the results. All the players' books were jewels. These are the results based on your Round 2- Writing style
Awkward. That's the adjective coming to mind. Especially their interactions, they don't come off as cute but feel awkward to read. I feel as though the scene hasn't been set as well as it could've been. There is definitely potential, only unrealized. Word choice, tone, and writer's voice as well as experience and emotions, and experience of emotions affect how your prose comes out drastically. Sentence construction could be much better, particularly for the dialogue as the impact on dialogue is detrimental. There are parts that made me cringe. They just didn't feel suited for the kind of people that the characters are.Use scene breaks to save the readers from unnecessary details that just drag the story down.The story itself feels a little juvenile and unfledged.
2.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
First, I'd like to talk about the font. Personally, it's unlikable. Writers use the most fonts like Calibri or Times New Roman because they are easily readable, and a much more considerate choice for readers with disabilities/neurodivergent readers. I believe the beauty of a story lies in its conveyance. My suggestion is to make yours accessible to a wider audience.The entire prose being bolded is not something that's suggested. It honestly made reading the thing a bit arduous. It's also a rookie mistake that most instructors will immediately shut down.Rather than phrases like a while later, it's better to use scene breaks. They don't take the reader away from the story. There is only space after commas and periods, not before. Too many details clutter the story. Think of what you are adding and its significance. If there is none, remove it. Sometimes, less is more.Some bits border on ridiculousness: eg- ordering instant noodles in a restaurant. Such parts drag your characterization through the mud. If I'm being honest, the human trafficking and this restaurant made me reject the protagonist and projected her as an airhead.Slang is acceptable in dialogues but not otherwise.If you're using romanised Korean words, please spell them correctly.Formatting is an important part of written storytelling. Sudden jumps in pov, brackets, etc are great repellents. If the pov changes frequently from character to character, then tell your story in 3rd person omnipresent.When you write stuff under the banner of a flashback, you can't give details regularly.There is a paragraph break when one person finishes speaking. When the next person starts, it's written in a new paragraph.The apostrophe is added after the n. Didn't, couldn't, can't.
![SQUID GAME BTS MAKNAE AWARDS 23 [CLOSED]](https://img.wattpad.com/cover/328754472-64-k485892.jpg)