A Vow of Silence

Chapter 33.

Nicole

I pulled in front of the address that Nero had sent me and stopped the car. There was no sign of Jax or his motorcycle and I was shaking like a leaf. Beside me, the pills that I picked up from Carmen's home were wrapped in a brown, paper bag. Accompanying it was a loaded gun that I didn't intend to use, but brought out of necessity.

I honestly hadn't come up with any distinct plan for how I was going to help this situation. I just jumped in my car and made everything up as I went. When I stopped by Carmen's house, I was hoping that I would have thought of something. But Carmen didn't meet up with me like I would have liked. She simply left the bag in her mailbox without another thought.

I knew it was better that way, because the less she knew the better. But I was way over my head with this, and a part of me knew that Gemma wasn't the type of woman who'd cheat Jax out of revenge. Even if that revenge entailed her death.

However, no matter how sick or demented this was; this was Gemma's way of loving her son. Her love was damaging and suffocating, and she didn't see how this could ruin him in the future. He probably wouldn't even have a future if he went through with killing his mother.

Jax was a determined man, but he wasn't strong enough for something like this. This would eat away at him until there was nothing left in his place. He was already at his breaking point, I couldn't allow her to take what little of him was left.

I swallowed the lump in my throat and willed myself out of my car. It was dark out, but I parked across the street so that I wouldn't alert her. I knew she'd be waiting for Jax, and anyone besides him would probably face some major consequences.

Surprisingly though, when I entered the home, Gemma was sitting peacefully on the floor with a photo album in her hands. When she noticed me, she didn't move or become aggressive. She simply just flipped to the next page in her photo album without missing a beat.

"Hey," she said calmly.

"Hey," I tried to hide the curiosity on my face as I approached her. "What are you doing?"

"Just looking at some old family pictures," she gave a small smile as she traced black and white photos of people I didn't know. "This is my dad when he was younger." She pointed at a picture of a small boy, "Jax looked just like him when he was younger."

"That's nice," I said not bothering to pay attention to what she was showing me. "You came all the way to Oregon for a photo album?"

Gemma sucked her teeth and gave me a look, "Do you always have to be so...you?"

"If being me implies that I don't believe that you drove all the way from California to Oregon for a photo album, then I don't think not being me is an option. So, like I asked before, what are you doing Gemma?"

Gemma inhaled a sharp breath and flipped through another page, "Oh I don't know Nicole, you seem to know everything, why don't you tell me what I'm doing."

I sucked my teeth at her need to still be sarcastic at this moment. She was stalling. She wanted Jax to come here and do what his code of ethics would have him do. What she wants him to do. But I that wasn't an option I was willing to give her.

I placed my purse down on the table in front of her and pulled out the brown bag. She looked up at me curiously as I pulled out the contents and placed them in front of her. I could see her gearing up to say something sarcastic, but then she froze when she noticed the gun in my hand.

"I'll tell you what you're going to do. You're going to take these pills, you're going to stay in this house, and you will die here. When the police come and investigate, they'll see that you died of a heart attack, and let's be honest. With your heart condition, it wouldn't be hard to believe."

Gemma stared at me with a bewildered expression, and then she squinted at me. "If you couldn't tell before, my son is big on revenge. He will kill for his family."

"Good, then that means I have nothing to worry about."

I heard her audibly gasp at my words, and then look frantically at the door when she heard the sound of an engine. I knew it wasn't Jax's bike, so I kept my eyes glued to her.

"If I were you, I'd take the pills and then maybe someday your memory can live on in a bedtime story, or when the boys are in their teens. But for now, you need to do something you've never succeeded at doing. Following instructions."

Gemma shook with rage and I couldn't help but see her frantically still checking the door. She wanted him to come, and that thought angered me.

"What kind of mother are you that you would do this to your family? What? Killing his wife wasn't enough, but now you want to ruin what is left of him."

"I AM A GOOD MOTHER!" she shouted at me. Her voice broke as tears filled her eyes, "I did everything for my boy. Anything he needed, I was there! You want to crucify me, well, go ahead! I loved Tara and I made a mistake!"

I cocked the gun in my hand and Gemma flinched at the sound. I crouched down in front of her and grabbed the album out of her hands and tossed it. "You killed your daughter-in-law. You killed the mother of your grandsons. And you killed your son's wife. You didn't make a mistake, you deliberately played a part in destroying your own family."

Gemma began to weep in front of me, but I felt no compassion or pity for the woman before me. Throughout my time with not only Jax but the boys, I've realized the trauma that Tara's death has brought. It is a trauma that will take years to recover from, especially for Abel. He was only five and somehow, the light that burned in the eyes of every five-year-old was fizzled out in his. And knowing that Gemma was the cause of that in a child so young made my blood boil.

"You will not destroy what is left of them. I don't care if I have to bury you myself. The pills or a bullet between the eyes, your choice."

Gemma started to breathe shaky and uneven breaths. Her breathing became rapid when she heard the sound of Jax's bike pulling into the driveway. She cried silently, but I didn't bother changing my demeanor at the sound of Jax's bike. My gun was still pointed at her and the pills were still on the table.

"You either get to say goodbye or I say goodbye for you. Act quickly, because once he walks in this house, deals off."