A Vow of Silence

Chapter 3.

Nicole

"Daddy!" I called out to my father as I walked inside the dimly lit house. He told me he would be awake to greet me, but the ride from San Diego took seven hours. I'm sure he was fast asleep somewhere around here.

"Dad!" I called out again until I noticed the old man fast asleep with a book in his hand. I felt a smile tug on my lips as I approached his sleeping body. I removed his bible from his chest and placed it on the lamp table. I shook him gently until he awoke from his sleep.

He blinked a few times at me and then adjusted his glasses on his face. "Nicky?" he said as if in disbelief. "Nicky!" he said again more enthusiastically as he pulled me into a hug. I allowed the embrace as he shook our bodies with his cries. Three years, the longest we've ever gone without seeing each other. It would have been less if the prison hadn't been so far for him. But that was okay, I didn't need him seeing what they did to women convicted of killing their children in prison.

"How you doing Dad? Hmm? Did you have dinner yet?" I asked as I ran my hand over his hair. He wiped at his tears with his handkerchief and waved me off. "Yeah, I ate a little while ago. I made myself a sandwich. I didn't have time to run to the store today, but I'm sure you'll be able to find something in there."

"Okay but let's just get you to bed first. Sound good?" I reached out to help him out of his armchair and allowed him to lean most of his weight on me. I could tell just by helping him that he'd lost more than enough weight. He seemed so frail from when I last saw him. I mean this was a man that would be a makeshift swing for my girls, and now he seemed like he could barely hold himself up.

When I placed him down on the bed, he stretched out on the mattress with a grunt. "Oh, it's good to have you home Nicky. I've been needing some help around the house, so I'm happy to have you here."

"No problem daddy, just try to get some rest okay." I placed a kiss on his forehead before I left the room. The home was small but it would be just fine for two people. I could tell that he was having trouble keeping up with it on his own, but that he was cleaning it to the best of his ability.

The spare room that was available was pretty much bare with simple bedding and a lack of wallpaper. It definitely was designed by my dad, that's for sure. I noticed pictures he put on the counters and examined the ones from my childhood. Big smiles and pretty barrettes in pictures I hardly remembered. It was always just me and my dad, and he always did his best with me. His sister, my aunt, used to help him out with me until she died of pancreatic cancer when I was sixteen. She taught me everything I knew about womanhood.

I felt a warmth in my chest while looking at the picture of the three of us at her Fourth of July barbeque. I probably was no more than six years old in the photo, but I couldn't remember a moment in my childhood that didn't make me smile.

However, when I noticed the picture of my girls on the nightstand, my chest tightened. The smile that I had fell from my lips as I took the photo and placed it face down in the first drawer. I couldn't look at my girls knowing that they never got justice. Seeing their face would only remind me that I failed as a mother.

I left the room and went into the kitchen in an attempt to take my mind off things with some food. However, when I looked inside the fridge, I was shocked to see that the only thing in there was some bread and milk. I closed the fridge and looked in the cabinets, but all I could find was a jar of peanut butter and some ready-to-eat Tuna. Well, that certainly wouldn't do.

I knew my dad said that he hadn't been shopping, but now I wondered for how long. It was clear to me that if I wanted something that wouldn't land me in the hospital tonight, then I would have to go out. And as much as I wanted to sleep for dinner, my hunger wouldn't allow it. So, I bit down, grabbed my keys, and headed out in search of food.

Charming was one of those small towns where everything closed before ten unless it was a convenience store or a bar. As I drove around, I took the opportunity to enjoy the quietness of the small town and its dimly lit lights. I'm sure by the looks of it that a twenty-four-hour Walmart would've blown their minds. San Diego made this place look like a dot on a map, maybe even smaller.

When I laid my eyes on a bar or a warehouse I pulled into it. Whatever it was it had the most vehicles parked, so I figured it was my best bet instead of driving around on the street. There were some people outside when I parked, and I noticed some motorcycles that equaled the number of cars.

Looking back now, I should have known this was not the place to get a burger. Maybe a hooker, but not a burger. When I walked in, there was a man at the entrance holding a clipboard. He seemed like someone who used to be big and scary, but with the cardigan and beads around his neck, I couldn't tell.

"Can I help you sweetheart?" he asked kindly.

I looked around at the women walking around in skimpy outfits and the flurry of men enjoying them. "No, I don't think you can. Matter of fact, I think it's best if I leave."

I turned on my heel and then felt a gentle hand on mine. "Woah momma, tell me what you need and I'll do my best to get it for you. Were you looking for someone?"

I smiled at him, "Nah, I was actually looking for somewhere to eat. I don't think what I want is on your menu tonight," I said gesturing over to a man sipping his drink off a woman's breast.

The man laughed, "I don't have a burger, but I can whip you up something from the back."

I cocked my head at him and raised an eyebrow. He noticed my hesitation and then pulled me forward by my hand, "trust me, I won't let anyone drink anything off you." He led me to the bar and sat me down on a barstool before leaving me with a blonde. "Lyla, can you get her a drink? I'm gonna go whip her up something to eat."

Lyla nodded her head and poured some brown liquor into a glass. She slid it over to me and I took it from her with appreciation. "So, what's your name? I haven't seen you around here before." I took a small sip of the liquor and allowed it to heat up my insides before I answered her.

"Nicole. I'm not from around here."

"Oh," she looked surprised, "are you a friend of Nero's?"

I shook my head lightly, "no, I actually was looking for somewhere to eat. He insisted on making me something from the back." I leaned forward in my seat, "he isn't trying to recruit me is he?"

Lyla laughed, "no, Nero isn't like that. He's just a really sweet guy." I nodded my head as I continued to talk to Lyla until Nero came back with a nice-looking sandwich. "Oh wow, what a hearty-looking meal," I said throwing a Lays chip in my mouth. Nero chuckled, "only the finest for our guest."

Nero then left me alone as I chowed down on my sandwich. The scene around me served as interesting entertainment. Kind of like Animal Planet during mating season.

The only other person who didn't seem to be interacting with the other men was a man sitting by himself with a yellow polo. He was talking with an older woman with blonde highlights. She was what I thought a biker wife would look like. Black leather, high boots, and the family crest on her chest.

I cocked my head at them in curiosity before the woman noticed me staring. I looked away and refrained from looking at her again, but she already had made her way over. "Need a refill darlin?" she asked, her voice husky and low.

I shook my head, "I've had more than enough, thank you." She nodded her head and slipped into the chair next to me. I was trying to keep to myself but I couldn't help but notice her shaking hands. I sucked on my bottom lip, "what lie did you tell?"

"Excuse me?" she asked looking over at me.

I took a sip of my drink, "my daddy always said that when your hands shake like that, you are either gearing up to tell a lie, or you already did."