Blue, Beyond

One Last Christmas

"Ends are not bad things, they just mean that something else is about to begin. And there are many things that don't really end, anyway, they just begin again in a new way. Ends are not bad and many ends aren't really an ending; some things are never-ending." -C. JoyBell C.

   Annie had woke Cate up and told her everything about her and Andrews interaction. Cate was taken back when she heard, in a good way. They've always been good at seeing grey in black and white situations but this was a whole new level of maturity. Cate was pleasantly surprised.

   "Andrew and I have decided that we want to tell the children after Christmas. Is that okay?" Cate grabbed Annie's hand. "That's perfectly understandable. One last Christmas?" Annie smiled. "Yes. That's the idea... one Edith can take with her. She'll remember the others, sure but I don't want this last one together to be tainted by bad news... I mean..." Cate didn't mean it the way it sounded.

   "I understand. It's not bad news but to them it will be" Annie smiled, with a hint of melancholy. "It's wonderful news and they'll see that in time" Cate kissed her head. "You think so?" Annie smiled to herself. "I know so" Cate took her hands in hers.

   "Should I be here?" Annie looked at Cate. "Why would you say that? Of course you should be here!" Cate took her face in her hands. "I... I know I WILL be family... but I'm not yet... at least to them... they have their parents this Christmas... I just... I don't want this to come out the wrong way but I don't know where I fit in" Annie said nervously.

   "I know. I know this is an unfair ask. I'm sorry" Cate sighed and sat on the bed. "It's just...none of this is easy" Cate put her hands on her head, exasperated. "It's okay... I just don't know what I should do is all. I haven't even gotten them gifts. I didn't get a chance" Annie blew out hot air, causing her bangs to fly up.

   "It's okay. They didn't get you anything either" Cate laughed. "That... that actually makes me feel better" Annie laughed along. "Look... you tell me how you want to proceed. I can spend Christmas pretending and smiling with you guys or I can stay in the guest house or something" Annie offered. "I just want this last Christmas to be perfect or memorable at least for the right reasons" Annie went on.

   "I want you with us. I know that's unfair to make you have to pretend. I know what I'm asking and I understand if you can't do it but I want you. This Christmas won't be perfect unless you're here with us" Cate held Annie's hand. "Are you sure?" Annie felt a tear forming. "I'm absolutely sure darling. You're our family. They don't know it yet but... you're the best thing that's ever happened to us" Cate sniffled. Annie looked up and realized she had been crying.

   "Cate, you're crying" Annie wiped her tear away, forming her own. "You are too darling" Cate wiped away her tear. "A bunch of babies" Annie joked. "I love you" Cate smirked at her. "I love you" Annie kissed her.

   "Let's go" Cate ordered. "Go where?" Annie protested. "Shopping" Cate laughed. "Shopping??" Annie laughed back. "Yes. We need to get the children gifts" Cate smiled. "Oh.... You didn't do that??" Annie covered her mouth. "Of course I did. Three months ago. For you, from you..." Cate smiled.

   "I didn't think I had time for that! Oh, yeah... that would be fantastic!" Annie got up quick. "Let's go get ready! Gotta beat some of the traffic!" Cate chuckled. They got ready, headed out and went to a few stores. Annie got Edith a Lego set. She got her the flower set. It was the ones where you can put them in a vase.

   She got Dash a video game. "Days Gone" it was one of her favorites for PlayStation and dash didn't have it yet. She got Roman a book on the Holocaust... seems like a rough gift but he's been into that lately and learning more from it, so she got him that along with a book light.

   She got Iggy a leather jacket. He's been real into the tough guy look lately, probably trying to impress Marissa because she's tough. So, she thought that was a good find. Cate laughed at her the whole time. When Annie found something her eyes got so big. Cate found amusement hearing her girlfriend talk about her children, their interests, things she's observed and learned about them.

   Annie was thoughtful and put a lot of energy into what she wanted to get them. This was also her first Christmas and Cate smiled thinking about that. She was like a kid. You can tell she was over the moon. "Okay... and is that everyone?" Cate asked Annie. "I believe so. I'm going to stop real quick in Macy's though" Annie went on.

   "Not for you. I already got you your gift" Annie smiled and so did Cate. "For Andrew. I'm going to get him a tie" Cate smiled at how thoughtful Annie was. She was so endearing. Cate was so in love with her. Annie came out of Macy's smiling with a bag in hand. "Now this is a sight I could look at forever" Cate thought to herself.

They made their way back home. Annie wrapped the gifts and Cate put final touches on hers. They put them under the tree after they sent everyone to bed. Andrew helped them as well with the stockings. They drank egg nog, all three pretty drunk, and they sang Christmas songs. Annie, Cate and Andrew laughed so hard at absolutely everything the whole night. It was the most fun Annie has had in a while.

Annie couldn't help but be so thankful for the family she's gotten herself into. She felt a little melancholy because hers was never like this. She was happy with the one she had now though. Annie loved them so much. It's that feeling of gratitude. That feeling where you don't know what you did right to get where you are but you're just thankful, eternally and you hope it never ends.

*****AUTHOR NOTE*****

HI GUYS! I'm sorry I haven't been super on it with this story. Life has just been busy lately. I hope I can stay more on it though. I write on my lunch breaks a good bit but work has been wild, so sometimes I use my lunch breaks to nap lol! Working with children is exhausting... such as the life of a teacher... lol! I'm hoping to get on here more though, so please stick with me! I hope you guys are enjoying the story. It's a bit of a slow burn but I'm hoping you guys like this kind of story. Please let me know what you think! Love you guys! Xx